Konoha Cruise Ship
by Hana-01
Summary: After an encounter with a fortune teller Sasuke finds his whole world changing, he's paranoid about people with red hair and he wants something he's never wanted before, Naruto and Sakura will help him in his attempts to get it, on board a crazy cruise!
1. Kiba's Predicament & Sasuke's Fair Fortu

**A/N: This is the sequel to Konoha's Bash, this story can be read as a stand-alone but I will be making some references to Konoha's Bash.**

**Just a small explanation for those who haven't read it: this story is based on the cruise that they win in Konoha's bash, the pairings established thus far are NaruSaku, ShikaTema, InoShino, NejiTen, GaaraMatsuri**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.**

**Chapter One – Kiba's predicament & Sasuke's fair fortune**

"Flowers...check, binoculars...check, now let's see, hmm, guard dogs huh? Bad idea, that won't work against me – the great Inuzuka!" Kiba was sitting hidden behind a small shrub outside the Hyuga compound. It consisted of two storeys and right now Kiba wished he had the byakugan so that he could see which room was Hinata's. He remembered her saying something about how it was on the top floor with a balcony and glass sliding doors. "All right, here I go, come on Akamaru!"

"Arf!"

The two ducked out of the shrub and made their way towards the compound. Upon seeing them, the big black guard dogs began snarling furiously. "Easy fellow dogs, I come in peace," Kiba said, brandishing the bouquet of flowers at them. The dog closest to him to a swipe at the bouquet – with its jaws and all the flowers that Ino picked out painstakingly for Kiba were gone. "Whoa! I'm not a – a trespasser!" Kiba said as more and more guard dogs came out of the darkness. They were barking and snarling ferociously, even Akamaru, big as he was, cowered behind Kiba.

"Shit, they might wake the old man up, or Neji!" Kiba whispered in terror, "Sit!" he commanded, as a member of the Inuzuka clan, this was child's play...or so he thought. "Uhm, roll over! Not working huh, well I've still got this!" he pulled a rice ball out of his pouch and threw it, "Fetch!"

For some reason, this seemed to have angered the dogs even more and they began barking madly. Akamaru whimpered. It was then that an idea occurred to Kiba, he took three steps back then ran at full speed towards the balcony and jumped on. "Hide boy, hide!" he commanded Akamaru before rapping on the glass door. "Hinata, open up quickly before your dad comes!"

The door was immediately flung open by –

"Tenten!"

"Kiba!"

"Who the hell is that?"

"Neji!"

Kiba coughed and wheezed and stumbled into the room, Tenten was looking quite dishevelled and Neji was looking pissed, well, more pissed than usual. "Tenten, what are you doing here?" Kiba asked, "And more importantly, how did you get passed those dogs?"

"What makes you think I had to sneak in to get here?" Tenten asked.

Kiba chuckled, "Sure, Hiashi just lets you visit Neji at any ungodly hour as you please."

"Hmph, well I just play this flute and they become as harmless as puppies."

"Ahhhh...but wait just a second, Neji's the guy here, he should be sneaking into _your _room, not the other way around!" Kiba said with an incredulous look.

Neji glared at him and Tenten laughed. "We take turns...to keep things exciting."

"Wow."

"Why are those dogs making such a racket outside? What is going on?" growled the voice of Hiashi Hyuga, his footsteps were getting closer to the room.

"Leave now! Before he comes here and we all get into trouble!" Neji hissed.

"Are you insane? I don't want to get mauled by those insane dogs!" Kiba said rather loudly.

"Get out! Get out!"

"What the devil is going on in here?" Hiashi asked, flinging open Neji's bedroom door to find Tenten, Neji and Kiba on the balcony. Tenten laughed nervously, "Hyuga-sama, we were just discussing our plans for the cruise tomorrow!"

"Is that right?" Hiashi asked, disbelief clear in his tone of voice.

"Yes! We are really excited about the cruise," Kiba added.

"Really now?"

"Yes sir," Kiba said, sweating as Hiashi came closer and leaned over the balcony.

"Why is there a mangled bouquet of flowers on my lawn?"

"That's uh...um, Tenten's! She was bringing them over for Hinata," Kiba lied quickly.

"Why is Tenten bringing Hinata flowers?" Hiashi asked suspiciously.

Tenten gave Kiba a sharp look before quickly smiling at Hiashi, "It's a girly thing we do."

"Uh huh..." Hiashi said, he didn't look like he was buying their story. Kiba was praying that he didn't get Hinata in trouble, knowing Hiashi, he might not allow her to go on the cruise.

"I don't know what you three are up too...and I'm not sure if I want to know, but please leave, Neji needs his sleep," Hiashi said.

Neji scowled while Tenten and Kiba tried to hold back their laughter.

"Okay, we will go now, Hyuga-sama," Tenten told him. Hiashi sighed and left the room and then Neji rounded on Kiba, "What did you come here for anyway?"

"I – I came to see Hinata, but I accidently got the wrong window," Kiba said, quite afraid that Neji might kick his ass for trying to sneak into Hinata's room.

"That's sweet," Tenten gushed.

"Why did you need to see her?" Neji further interrogated.

"Well...you see...it's like this right. At the party, I was kinda drunk and I told Hinata I loved her and she laughed at me," Kiba said with his head hung, "So I can't take it anymore! I can't eat, or sleep or dream or train without her in my head and she needs to know! I need to tell her again that I love her while I am sober!"

"Wow, that's...lame," Neji said.

"Neji!" Tenten scolded, "Kiba, you will have plenty of time on the cruise to talk to her alone. Don't worry about it."

"Wait just a minute, I'm not letting this mutt date my innocent little cousin," Neji said angrily.

"Oh yeah? Well it isn't up to you! Let's let Hinata decide," Kiba said, raising his fists.

"You stay away from Hinata or I'll break your limbs and then beat you with them!"

"She and I are on the same team in case you forgot!"

"What did I just say!" Hiashi's voice thundered from the hallway, "Must I come in there and haul you over the balcony by your undergarments?"

"Okay I'm out of here!" Kiba said, as he jumped down.

"Me too," said Tenten, giving Neji a quick peck and then joining Kiba.

She pulled the little flute out of her pouch and began playing. The vicious dogs stopped barking and started wagging their tails happily. "I need one of those," Kiba said and Tenten laughed as they quickly ran out of the yard.

-X-

"We're off!" Naruto Uzumaki declared loudly with his fists raised. The Konoha 12, their Jounin sensei's, the Sand Siblings and Matsuri were walking to the nearest port in the Land of Waves. Their ship would be sailing from there to the Land of Water where they would then visit several exotic islands. The girls, with the exception of Hinata, were especially excited because they would get to flaunt their bikini's. The gang walked for a while before Naruto pointed out a massive tent which was situated in the middle of nowhere. "Naruto, don't you dare go in there!" Sakura warned him.

"Why not? It says 'come in'," Naruto justified. Everyone face-palmed.

"Let's check it out!" Kiba said.

"No, we might miss our ship," Kurenai said in irritation, she was heavily pregnant and her feet were really sore.

"Please!" wailed Naruto.

"Fine, but we'll make it quick," Kakashi warned. Naruto lifted up the tents flap and the rest of the ninja filed in apprehensively. The inside of the tent was dimly lit, there were gauzy scarves hung everywhere and incense was burning.

"Welcome," said a velvety woman's voice from deep inside the tent.

"Let's run," Asuma suggested.

"I, Madame Shion will read the stars and tell you your fortune."

"But the stars are not out yet," Kankuro pointed out.

"I have a crystal ball..." Shion said, coming into view.

"Hey!" Naruto shouted, "You're that Priestess we saved!"

Shion blinked, "Naruto-kun! So you have come back to help me with the next Priestess (1)!"

"Like hell he will!" Sakura said angrily. Shion giggled and sat down on a futon. She was wearing a midriff bearing top and she had violet eyes and long blonde hair. She motioned for the group to sit down, "I will see each of you individually...starting with..._you_," she pointed to Neji. Neji pointed at himself, "Me?"

"Yes you," Shion said somewhat seductively, earning her a glare from Tenten.

"Go forth my youthful student and find out your fortune!" Gai said, clapping Neji on the back and knocking him forward. A few minutes later Neji came back looking very worried.

"What's wrong Neji? What did she say?" Tenten asked.

"She's for real, she knows everything and I don't doubt that she is wrong about my destiny."

"Well duh, she is a Priestess," Naruto said.

One after one they all went to get their fortunes told; Kiba came out looking angry, Hinata came out looking confused, Tenten looked happy, Lee looked youthful, Sakura and Naruto went in together and came out grinning, Shikamaru was looking sleepy, Ino looked irritated, Chouji looked hungry, Shino looked smug, Gaara came out wearing the same expression he had all day, Temari looked pensive, Kankuro looked constipated, Matsuri looked happy, Kakashi looked worried, Kurenai and Asuma looked excited and Gai looked pumped up.

"Come on Sasuke-kun, your turn!" Sakura told her moody friend who was stubbornly refusing to go have his fortune read.

"This is ridiculous," Sasuke scoffed.

"Go you bastard!" Naruto yelled.

"He's afraid," Kiba said with a smirk.

"I'm not."

"Then prove it."

"Make me, bitch."

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said in disbelief.

"What did you call me, you Uchiha scum?" Kiba snarled.

"K-Kiba-kun please d-don't fight," Hinata said.

"Yeah, listen to your girlfriend Kiba," Sasuke said with a smirk.

Kiba mumbled something and blushed while Hinata blushed even redder.

"Come on Sasuke-kun!" Shion suddenly appeared, latching on to his arm and dragging him into the depths of the tent, "So handsome," she said breathlessly. Sasuke scowled at her.

"Well let's get started," she said, closing her eyes and rubbing the crystal ball.

Sasuke was looking sceptically at it and Shion was chanting some foreign words.

"Hmmm...you will fall for a beautiful flower...delicate and rare to find, but beware for others also desire this flower and you will have to fight for it."

"What? A flower? What the hell?"

"I speak figuratively."

"Tch. What nonsense. I'm leaving."

"Wait! There is something else," Shion said frantically.

Sasuke raised his eyebrow, "Yeah?"

"Beware of people with red hair."

**A/N: Ooh, what does Shion's warning mean?**

– **This is a reference from the first Naruto Shipuuden movie after the end credits.**

**Please review and tell me your thoughts and ideas **

**Next Chapter: The guy that went overboard. Coming soon!**


	2. The Man Who Went Overboard

**Chapter Two – The Man Who Went Overboard**

Sasuke made his way out of the fortune tellers tent and back outside where everyone else was waiting. He was feeling a bit dizzy from all that incense. "Hurry up, the ship will set sail in twenty minutes," Asuma said. They had to pick up the pace and start walking faster, which was a mission in itself because of all the luggage they had between them.

"Hey Hinata, want me to help carry your bags?" Kiba asked, walking beside her and grinning.

"It's okay Kiba-kun, you have your bags to carry too."

"I insist! I can carry it all!"

"Tch. What a loser," Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"You got something to say Uchiha, say it to my face!" Kiba said, his face heating up.

"Hn. It's halfway through the trip and only now you're offering to carry your girlfriends bags."

Hinata and Kiba both turned red. "Besides, you couldn't even carry all of her bags," Sasuke continued.

"Oh yeah! Well neither could you, you're just a jerk."

Without a word, Sasuke grabbed Hinata's luggage and hauled it over his own.

"Sasuke-kun!" Hinata said in shock.

"Shut up."

Kiba was looking enraged as Sasuke smirked at him but Kiba didn't retaliate – probably because he was trying to get in Hinata's good books and somewhere else, ahem.

Sasuke didn't know why he was picking on Kiba today, well, it wasn't like he had anything better to do. Besides, carrying this extra load was training.

"Neji! Let me carry your luggage!" Lee said enthusiastically.

"That's my youthful student, always finding a golden opportunity to train," Gai said, giving Lee a thumbs up.

"Forget it," Neji barked at him.

"So, what did Shion tell you?" Naruto asked, appearing beside Sasuke.

"That you're stupid and I should stay away from you before I catch it," Sasuke snapped.

"Wow, you're in a good mood," Naruto said.

"Hn."

"But seriously, what did she say?" Sakura asked.

Sasuke sighed, "Something about flowers and people with red hair."

"Hmm, quite abstract," Sakura said thoughtfully. Sasuke looked at her out of the corner of his eye, she had pink hair, that was a shade or three lighter than red. _Maybe I have to stay away from her! _Sasuke shook his head, he was not about to get paranoid over some lame fortune tellers predictions. Sasuke readjusted his grip on a lilac tote bag patterned with lilies. At least this girl didn't have much luggage, if it were Ino's then he would have had a problem.

They finally got on board the ship which was magnificent in size and splendour. Everyone stood on the deck waiting for Kakashi to call out which cabins they would be staying in.

"Right, cabin 8, Naruto and Sasuke; cabin 9, Sakura and Ino - "

"Yay! I get to stay next to Sakura-chan!" Naruto said with excitement in his blue eyes.

"Yeah...anyway, cabin 10, Kiba and Shino; cabin 11, Temari and Matsuri; cabin 12, Neji and Lee; cabin 13, Tenten and Kurenai; cabin 14, Gaara and Kankuro; cabin 15, Shikamaru and Choji and cabin 16 will be Asuma, Gai and I."

"Sensei, what about Hinata?" asked Kiba.

"Ah, yes, Hiashi-sama ordered that she have a cabin of her own so we assigned her cabin 17. But, unfortunately, if the crew staff need to place somebody else there, then she won't have it to herself," said Kakashi. Hinata was embarrassed because of the special treatment she was receiving, she would much rather be with someone than stay alone on this trip.

Sasuke felt his mind go into overdrive, it was a mystery to him because he was not very superstitious, but he realised that Gaara would be staying in cabin 13 _and _he had red hair, added to that was the fact that Gaara was a former psycho. _Gah! That incense must have seriously messed with my brain, _Sasuke thought.

"Um...Sasuke-kun, can I have my bags please?"

"What? Oh yeah," Sasuke said, handing Hinata all of her stuff.

"Come on Sasuke! Let's go check out our cabin," Naruto said, clapping him on the back. Sasuke followed his knuckleheaded teammate but he couldn't shake off the weird, uneasy, unexplainable feeling in the pit of his stomach.

-X-

"Ah! Pein, this is so great!" Konan gushed, "Oh its amazing!"

"I know, I know," Pein said, with a smug look on his face.

Itachi Uchiha and Kisame Hoshigaki looked at each other and were communicating via stares:

Itachi: _There has to be a catch somewhere along the line._

Kisame: _Itachi-san, you used a fishing pun._

Itachi: _Be serious Kisame, what do you think Leader is plotting?_

Kisame: _Nothing, maybe it's really just a vacation._

"What are we going to do here and how much did you spend on this?" Kakuzu asked.

Hidan, Deidara and Tobi weren't wasting any time, their Akatsuki cloaks were off and they were lying on pool chairs on the upper deck wearing swimming trunks. Hidan was shirtless but Deidara and Tobi had T-shirts on. "Ah this is the life, un."

"Senpai! Will you please rub suntan lotion on my body?" Tobi asked, holding up a bottle.

Deidara smacked it out of his hand, "Never!"

"Aw..."

"I figured this was an ideal opportunity to take a small break, promote teamwork, maybe catch a jinchuuriki or two..." Pein said.

Itachi gave Kisame the 'told you so' look.

"Pein! I thought you said this was a holiday," Konan frowned.

Pein shrugged, "Sure it is, it's just like a working holiday..."

Konan groaned. _Oh well, doesn't stop me from wearing my hot little bikini!_

-X-

A little dinghy was floating along in the ocean carrying three people on it. "There it is, the S.S. Shinobi!" said Suigetsu Houzuki, motioning to a large ship not too far away.

"How are we going to get on?" asked Jugo.

"I have a plan," said Karin, holding a flare gun. She had a very devious look on her face as she suddenly pushed Suigetsu overboard the dinghy. "Hey! What gives, you cow!" Suigetsu said indignantly, although he didn't mind being in the water, it was like home to him. Karin shot the flare gun into the air. "Come on Jugo, wave your arms in the air and Suigetsu, stop acting like an athlete swimmer and act you're drowning instead!"

They were given explicit orders by Orochimaru to convince Sasuke Uchiha to join him and if they failed at the convincing part, they were to kidnap him. Orochimaru and the Sound Five had failed to get at Sasuke during the party and Orochimaru wasn't about to give up on getting Sasuke's body just yet. The first part of the plan involved getting onto the ship that Sasuke was on. Orochimaru had heard about the cruise from one of his spies in the village and immediately conjured up a plan to seize the young Uchiha.

Karin and Jugo waved their arms in unison yelling, "Help!" while Suigetsu feigned drowning. "Drowning feels great," Suigetsu said with a blissful sigh.

"Shut the hell up, they're coming!" Karin scolded.

"Stay calm, we are sending assistance," someone said. A lot of people were standing and looking at them from the S.S. Shinobi so Karin decided to put on her most dramatic act...which consisted of crying and latching onto Jugo, "Please save him!" she wailed.

"What's taking so long?" asked a blonde, spikey haired ninja, "That guy is drowning."

Karin was still carrying out her performance, wailing on Jugo's chest until he lost his balance. Now, Jugo was a big guy and his unbalance caused the tiny dinghy to tip over.

"Aaaargh!"

"Come on Sasuke, we have to help them!" Naruto said, jumping into action.

"No, no, let the crew handle that - " Sasuke said, but Naruto had already jumped overboard.

Sasuke sighed and jumped in after him, and not to be left out, Kiba also jumped in on this rescue mission. Naruto swam towards Suigetsu who was floating face down on the surface of the water. Sasuke swam towards someone who was splashing wildly and lifted them up, it was then that his heart almost stopped – a red haired girl. Sasuke stared at her in shock while Karin stared back with a glazed over look on her face. Her mind was made up, this was going to be her future husband. Sasuke gasped and practically tossed her towards Kiba and he went after the other guy. _Orange hair! Safe! Oh man, what is happening to me? _Sasuke wondered as he lugged Jugo towards the ship where there were ropes waiting to pull them up. Sakura was in charge of heaving them up because of her amazing strength.

Ino, Hinata and Temari quickly covered the 'victims' with blankets.

"Thank you for saving me," Karin gushed, batting her eyelashes at Sasuke.

"Hey! I was the one who carried you out here," Kiba said indignantly. Karin ignored him and held Sasuke's arm, "You're Sasuke Uchiha, I've heard _so_ much about you and," she lowered her voice to a flirtatious whisper, "_Your body_."

"From whom exactly?" Sasuke asked, yanking his arm away.

"Orochimaru-sama, I work for him," Karin said.

Sasuke tried not to look absolutely horrified as he walked away quickly.

"Hey, where are you going? Playing hard to get hey? Well I _love_ to play," Karin said with a giggle.

Sasuke walked faster until he got back to the cabin, Naruto had followed him, "What's the deal Sasuke? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Go away."

"This is my cabin too!"

"Don't remind me..."

"Oh I know what this is all about...you like Hinata!"

Sasuke turned around with a raised eyebrow, wondering how Naruto could have arrived at such a conclusion. "Come again?"

"You like Hinata! It's so obvious, you went with her to the party, you carried her bags today _and _you wanted to act all heroic in front of her today to save all those people," Naruto said, his blue eyes were practically shining. Sasuke cleared his throat, "No, you're wrong. I went with her to the party because she picked _me _out of a draw, I carried her bags because I wanted to piss Kiba off and it was your idea to rescue those people anyway."

"Oh yeah. But you guys won cutest couple at the party!"

"Hn."

"And she's so pretty and strong and really kind - "

"Great, then why don't you date her," Sasuke interrupted.

"Don't be silly you bastard, she doesn't like me, I know because she gets like all red and doesn't like to talk when I'm around," Naruto said, scratching his head.

Sasuke stared at Naruto in disbelief, "Wow, you really are stupid."

"What's that supposed to mean!" Naruto asked, outraged.

"Nevermind," Sasuke said, flopping down onto his bed.

"Anyway, I'm dating Sakura-chan and she's the only girl for me! You better get a move on and get a girlfriend too before people start thinking you're gay – you aren't gay right? Because if you are then I'm asking Kakashi-sensei to move you to another cabin!"

"Shut up you fool, I'm not gay."

Naruto lay down on his own bed and stared at the ceiling, "I have an idea."

There was no response from Sasuke, Naruto looked at him. "Oh come on, don't pretend to sleep and just hear me out!"

Sasuke opened his eyes, he would never get a moment of peace with Naruto around, "What?"

"Let's forget about everything! About the Akatsuki coming after me, about revenge, about Orochimaru trying to have his way with you, and just have a good time on this cruise."

Sasuke thought about it, while he would love nothing more than to decapitate Itachi and Orochimaru, having a good time on this cruise was also a tempting idea.

"Let's have an adventure," Naruto continued.

"Hn," Sasuke said, but a small smile formed on his lips as he imagined a field of lilies and long, lavender scented midnight blue hair. He sat bolt upright in shock, _What the hell! Where did that come from!_

**A/N: Uh oh...What's happening to Sasuke?**

**Please review! I write faster when you do, haha. **

**Next time: The underpants**


	3. The Underpants

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and put this story on alert and favourites!**

**Chapter 3 – The Underpants**

One of the S.S. Shinobi crew members consulted his cabin booking sheet and looked at the three new passengers before him. "Cabin 3 is available, that is if you three don't mind sharing."

"I'm a lady! You don't expect me to share a room with two guys, imagine what would happen to me!" Karin screeched.

"Absolutely nothing," Suigetsu muttered under his breath.

"There is another room available with a female occupant," said the crew member.

"Great, I'll take it, and charge all of this to The Hidden Village of Sound," Karin said.

"Sure, okay, you're in cabin 17." The crew member handed her a card.

Karin made her way to cabin 17 and Jugo and Suigetsu made their way to cabin 3. Karin slid her card into the slot and the door clicked open. A girl with long, straight indigo hair was unpacking her belongings, "H-hello," she greeted Karin with a stutter.

Karin grinned, 'Hey new roomie."

"I'm Hinata, I'm glad someone will be staying here."

"Karin. Hey, are you from Konoha?"

"Yes, why?" Hinata asked, folding a swimsuit.

"So you must know Sasuke Uchiha!"

"...Kind of," Hinata said, she honestly did not pay much attention to him, her attention being mostly devoted to Naruto. Sasuke had gone to the shinobi party with her and overall he was nice but a bit dull and he kept hinting that Kiba liked her, so she wasn't really sure what to make of Sasuke.

"I need to know everything about him!" Karin yelled, making Hinata jump slightly. Karin had a notebook out and her pen was poised, ready to take notes. _It's wrong to give out information about ninja! _Hinata thought, and she shook her head, "I-I'm sorry, I can't tell you. It's against the rules of the ninja."

"Oh, I don't want to know about his techniques, I want to know what's his favourite colour, his favourite food, his favourite movie, if he's single – that sort of thing," Karin said, her cheeks were red. Hinata smiled, this girl clearly had a crush on Sasuke, Hinata was a sucker for helping people with crushes, but this was going to be a hard one.

"Well, he is s-single, I think..." Hinata offered. Karin stood up suddenly, "Thank you! That was all I needed to know!" _ if he wasn't single, that wouldn't have stopped me either, _thought Karin as she dashed out of the door to find the love of her life. She ran all the way up to the upper deck, which oversaw the rest of the ship, so she could stage a casual run-in with Sasuke when he emerged from...well wherever he was at the moment. Karin glanced around for a good spot to wait, it was then that she saw something remarkable. She grinned naughtily.

-X-

Things were ever so peaceful when Naruto was asleep, Sasuke didn't have to put up with his annoying voice, his idiotic comments and his random outbursts of "I'm going to become Hokage!" Yes, things were quite tranquil at the moment, Sasuke could think, but then he found out that his thoughts were not so safe either. He was thinking about things that clearly didn't make sense and hence shouldn't even be thought about. He tried to clear his mind and think about something useful – like vengeance. _Oh yes, I will kill you Itachi...right after I – no! Going into bad thought land again, bad thoughts, bad thoughts, _Sasuke was having an internal freak out. _Maybe I'll just go into the forest and train for a while, that should help but oh wait, I can't do that because I'm on a freaking ship! Ah, what the hell, I'll just go challenge Kiba since Naruto is asleep. _Sasuke opened the door to his cabin and stepped outside, _I love the sea breeze, hmmm that smell is familiar, _he thought, closing his eyes and enjoying the moment. "Hello Sasuke-kun," said a soft voice.

He opened his eyes and located the source of the smell – it was Hinata Hyuga and her lavender scented...whatever it was. He nodded at her.

"How are you?" she asked so politely that Sasuke couldn't be rude and ignore her.

"Fine."

_Why is this girl talking to me, she doesn't usually talk to me, _Sasuke wondered, eyeing her suspiciously but she wasn't even looking at him. She was standing with her hands folded in front of her, smiling and looking out to sea with her hair blowing out in the breeze. Sasuke realized he was staring when Hinata said, "Sasuke-kun?"

"What? I was thinking!" Sasuke said sharply, covering for his stare.

"O-oh, sorry," she stammered.

"Hn."

"Did Karin speak with you yet?" she asked, still smiling.

_Goddamit, why must she smile like that? _Sasuke wondered angrily, and then once he got over that, he realized what she had just asked him. "Who is that?"

"The girl Kiba-kun saved from drowning – she has red hair and wears glasses."

Something inside Sasuke snapped, "What? Oh no no no, you tell her to stay the hell away from me or she'll be dealing with the business end of my chidori!"

Hinata looked more baffled than scared, "O-oh okay, why?"

"She gives off a bad vibe..." Sasuke said, scowling. One of the cabin doors opened and out walked Gaara, "Hello Hinata-san, Sasuke-kun, am I interrupting something?" he asked, looking from a worried-looking Hinata to a glaring Sasuke.

"N-no, I'm just leaving," Hinata said, "Bye Gaara-kun, bye Sasuke-kun."

"May I speak with you for a moment, Sasuke-kun?" Gaara asked in his low voice.

Sasuke looked up and for a fraction of a second, his eyes widened and he looked like he was on the verge of a mental breakdown. "NO!"

Gaara blinked, all he wanted to do was ask Sasuke if he knew where the bathrooms were on the ship.

"Naruto, wake up!" Sasuke said, grabbing the boy and shaking the sleep out of him.

"Nyah, I don't wanna go back to the academy, please don't me go back...they'll take my ramen," Naruto said, clearly still asleep.

"Wake up you idiot!" Sasuke shook him more violently.

"W-whass going on?" Naruto asked, rubbing his eyes and looking annoyed.

"That priestess did something to me," Sasuke said.

"Hmm what?"

"I don't know, but after her prediction...things have been getting...strange."

"How?" Naruto asked, now he was awake and interested.

"Every red-haired person on this ship is out to get me and...and..." Sasuke couldn't bring himself to talk about the next part just yet.

"You're just being paranoid," Naruto told his friend, "Besides, there aren't any red-haired people on the ship."

"What about Gaara and that girl that nearly drown?"

"Oh yeah! But that's just two people, Sasuke."

_Naruto's right, no need to lose my cool. That's right, I'm an Uchiha, I'm cool by default. Maybe I'm just seasick...without the throwing up part. Nothing to worry about, _Sasuke thought as he tried to calm down.

-X-

"This has got to be his, it's so elegant, stylish – this symbol on it must be some designer symbol. It's so sexy I'm in love!" Karin squealed, she looked to see if anyone was wandering about and when the coast was clear, she snatched the garment off the clothes line.

"Such soft fabric!" she gushed, then she held it up to her nose and her eyes went all unfocused, "Smells dreamy, I'll be keeping you." She giggled and stashed the pair of spankies in the pocket of her shorts. She took a slow walk back to her room, eager to run into Sasuke, but he was nowhere in sight. Hinata was writing in her journal when Karin got back.

"See what I have," Karin said in a sing-song voice, holding up the spankies.

Hinata blushed, "I-is that someone's underpants?"

"Yup, it's Sasuke's! I took it from the clothes line on the upper deck!"

"How do you know that's h-his?"

"Oh I know it is because it just reeks of sexiness and awesomeness," Karin said, and she tucked it under her pillow. Hinata gulped, wondering about this girls mentality.

"H-he might get mad if he finds out that you've taken his...his..."

"He won't find out, well, not until we're married anyway!"

-X-

That evening, Hidan emerged from a very refreshing shower which soothed all of his frustrations that he got from not being able to perform sacrifices on board the ship.

"Dammit Hidan, cover up when you get out of the shower, that's what towels are for!" Kakuzu snarled. Hidan was standing in their cabin, butt naked and dripping with water.

"I forgot to take my fucking towel, get over it old man."

"So you walked all the way from the bathroom area to this cabin...naked?"

"Yeah, the ocean breeze is so refreshing on the - "

"Shut up Hidan, and put some clothes on or I'll kill you," Kakuzu threatened.

"Empty threats again, fine, I'll put clothes on," Hidan said, opening his drawer, he searched around for his clothes but couldn't find any.

"The top draw is mine," Kakuzu said.

"Why do you get the fucking top draw?" Hidan said and yanked open the bottom draw, "Hey did the maid bring back our clothes from the upper deck?"

"Yeah."

"Then where the fuck is my underpants?" Hidan asked, throwing stuff out, looking for his underpants. 'That was my last clean pair, I need them!"

"What? You had only one pair of underwear?" Kakuzu asked, although in the back of his mind he thought that was very cost effective, just buy one and wash and wear.

"Of course not you dumbshit, I forgot to put the others out for washing!"

"Then that's your own fault."

"Oh fuck you! I must find it, that was my last clean pair and my one of a kind spankies with the Jashin symbol on them made from the softest cotton!" Hidan said in outrage, standing up and giving Kakuzu a full frontal and unwanted view. "Put your clothes on," Kakuzu growled.

Hidan reluctantly slipped into a pair of boxers, "Fucking maid must've gotten it mixed up with one of the other members underwear, but I will find it..."

**Will Hidan find out who has his underwear?**

**Will Sasuke go insane?**

**Find out in the next chapter: He talks in his sleep**

**Please, please review!**


	4. He Talks In His Sleep

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto**

**This chapter is dedicated to Echo Uchiha who reads and reviews all my stories yay! Thank you! **

**Chapter 4 – He Talks In His Sleep**

It was a beautiful day outside, the sky was blue, the breeze was balmy and all the Konoha and the Suna ninja's were enjoying sunbathing on the deck – all except one young ninja who was nowhere to be seen. Sakura and Naruto were holding hands and just staring out into the horizon when Sakura suddenly remembered something, "Hey, where's Sasuke-kun?"

"He is hiding in his room," Naruto told her.

"What? Why?" Sakura wanted to know. Naruto shrugged, "Been acting kind of weird."

"In what way?"

"Like in a weird way," Naruto said. Sakura held herself back from throwing Naruto overboard, "Let's go get him."

"But why Sakura-chan? I want to be alone with you!" Naruto whined.

Sakura sighed, "He's our friend too you know...we can't just leave him out, he might...relapse into his revenge obsessed state."

"Fine...let's go," Naruto said. They took a leisurely walk to the cabin and Sakura was about to knock but Naruto just barged in. "...nine hundred and fifty, nine hundred and fifty one, nine hundred and fifty two..." Naruto and Sakura just stood in the doorway in shock until Sasuke noticed them and paused from doing his push-ups. "What is it?"

"What are you doing?" Naruto asked his sweat-covered friend.

"Push-ups, can't you see?" Sasuke snapped.

"I know that, but why?"

"Training."

"Sasuke-kun, we're on holiday, let's have some fun," Sakura said brightly. Sasuke surveyed them, maybe he should go along with them, perhaps they would prove to be more distracting than what he was currently trying. He was only training to try and distract himself from crazy thoughts that were worming their way into his brain from the moment he set foot on this ship.

"Okay, let's go," Sasuke told them.

"Dude, first go take a shower," Naruto said, pinching the bridge of his nose. Sasuke scowled at him and yanked a towel off his bed, pushed passed them and went to the bathroom area.

"I think something is bothering him," Sakura said with a worried expression on her face, "You can wait here for him until he gets back, I'm going to see if the others want to do something, you guys meet me back at the upper deck."

"Okay Sakura-chan!" Naruto said with a salute. Sasuke was back after fifteen minutes, fully dressed and smelling daisy fresh again. "Where are we going?" he asked, looking sullen as always. Naruto was grinning broadly, "Sakura-chan went to gather more people."

"M-more people?" Sasuke asked, more people meant that there was more chance of – no he could not let that happen.

"But first, let me show you something!" Naruto said, excitement written all over his face so Sasuke just sighed and followed him. They walked along the corridor of the ship and came to what looked like a small restaurant. "This is where I want to take Sakura-chan tomorrow, do you think she'll like it?"

Sasuke didn't know, or care, but he nodded.

"Yay! Now I can't wait!" Naruto said, "Oh look, there's Kiba and Hinata, I wonder if they're on a date." Sure enough, when Sasuke looked, Kiba and Hinata were sitting at a table together. Kiba had a glass of coke in front of him and Hinata had a glass of milkshake. Kiba seemed to be talking non-stop and Hinata was listening politely, occasionally smiling and nodding. Sasuke felt a strange feeling come over him...it felt just like that feeling he had when his father used to always compliment Itachi instead of him, like that feeling when Itachi got that shiny, brand new kunai set while Sasuke got a plushie toy and like when Naruto ever succeeded at beating him at something.

"Hey, Sasuke, what's wrong? You look like you want to kill someone!" Naruto said, breaking him out of his reverie. Sasuke realised that his fist was clenched.

"Nothing."

"Oh...okay! Let's go over and say hi!"

"Huh? No! - "

But he was already dragged off against his will to Kiba and Hinata's table. Naruto greeted them while Sasuke just stood and stared. "Yo guys, are you on a date?" Naruto asked boldly.

Kiba and Hinata blushed and quickly muttered no. "We're waiting for Shino," Kiba explained, "What are you guys up to?"

"Sakura-chan and I are going to show Sasuke how to have some fun!"

"Tch. Whatever," Sasuke said, and made the mistake of looking at Hinata who merely smiled at him. Sasuke's breath caught in his throat and he suddenly felt as if he were having a minor heart attack.

-X-

It had been one day since Hidan's underpants went missing and he was getting extremely pissed. If it had gotten mixed up with any of the other members clothes, shouldn't they have had the decency to return it to him? "Jashin will smite them!" Hidan declared to the ceiling of his room. All the other members had gone off to have lunch but he preferred to stay back and pray, in fact, as he sat there reading his scriptures, he thought that this would be an ideal opportunity to search their rooms for his missing garment. "I'll start with that prick Kakuzu," Hidan said, yanking open the drawer. Kakuzu was one untidy guy as Hidan soon found out as he searched. He pulled up a pair of underpants that were covered with ryo signs, "Typical," Hidan said tossing it aside. At the bottom of the draw lay a black book, Hidan's curiosity got the better of him and he picked it up and opened it. Instead of seeing numbers and amounts like he expected, but there were drawing of various clothing items with photographs taped next to them. There was a picture of that Kyubi Jinchuriki's orange outfit, the Akatsuki cloaks, Gai and Lee's jumpsuits and many more. Hidan flipped to the front of the book where it read 'Mr. Stitch – for all your outfitting requirements'.

"Whoa...Kakuzu secretly designs and sews...clothes," Hidan said in awe. This was great, along with locating his underpants he could get some dirt on all the other members. He practically skipped off to his next destination, which was Sasori, Deidara and Tobi's room. He decided to search Tobi first but upon searching all the drawers, they were all empty. "Strange," said Hidan, moving on to Deidara's side of the room. There was nothing of interest amongst Deidara's belongings and Hidan looked through his underpants and pulled out a pair of spankies which had 'Dynamite comes in small packages' on the front. Hidan laughed himself sick, "What a thing to put on underpants – small package, bwahahaha!"

Hidan tossed it back in the draw and went to Sasori's cupboard but it was locked, luckily Hidan knew his way around locks and he had it open in no time.

"What in Jashin's name - " Hidan stared open-mouthed into the cupboard which contained four puppets all in unspeakable positions and some camera equipment. There was a stack of tapes next to the puppets and Hidan grabbed the first one. "Suna's Blue Ocean – that sounds vaguely familiar," Hidan said, walking over to the television set. He put the tape in and began to watch. Some really cheesy music was playing and Hidan was gaping at the screen as the scenes unfolded. "...the fuck is this shit?" Hidan asked out loud, "So Sasori's the guy who makes these? The sick bastard...puppet porn, what next?"

He put everything back in order and went to Itachi and Kisame's room next, that one was a bit harder to get into but eventually he managed it. All Kisame's underpants were blue and patterned with various underwater creatures so Hidan moved on to Itachi's. Itachi was a very meticulous guy and all the underpants were arranged according to the colours. Hidan pulled out a newspaper cut out that was nestled in between the undies. The cut out was that of a girl's picture, she was rather good looking with a dark brown hair and red markings on her face and Hidan found himself nodding his approval, "Nice one Uchiha, you go get her."

Hidan didn't find his underpants there, he actually didn't expect Itachi to have taken it anyway. Next up on his list was Zetsu, when he got the door to the room open he was nearly knocked unconscious by an overpowering stench that came from within. "Fuck that, even if it's there I sure as hell don't want it anymore!" Hidan said, stumbling to the last room – Pein and Konan's. He searched Konan's draw first even though she probably didn't take it since she was a woman, but Hidan couldn't resist checking out what she wore underneath that Akatsuki cloak. His eyes were rewarded when he pulled out a lacy red thong, he grinned and pocketed it. He pulled open Pein's draw and gasped, their leader wore leather studded thongs.

"Guess it ain't here, fuck, I wonder where the hell it is."

Meanwhile, one red-haired girl hugged the pair of underpants close to her, "I will get you Sasuke Uchiha...I can't wait! Ehehehe."

-X-

That night, Naruto was awoken from his sleep by the sound of a voice which was speaking incessantly. He turned on his night light and looked over at Sasuke's bed. Sasuke was lying on his back, eyes-shut, fast-asleep yet speaking as if he were having a conversation with someone. "Oh it's just Sasuke sleep-talking again," Naruto said, turning the light off. He, Sakura and Kakashi were quite used to this as Sasuke often talked in his sleep when they were on missions and he probably did it while he was alone in his own house too. Naruto suspected it was why the boy rarely spoke when he was awake, because he talked so much when he was asleep. He spoke about becoming stronger, killing Itachi, vengeance...you know, the usual. Kakashi, Sakura and Naruto had turned it into a sort of game when they went on missions, they would wait for Sasuke to fall asleep then ask him stupid questions to which they received even stupider responses.

"_Kiba is in the way," _Sasuke said.

Naruto's ears perked up and he decided to play the game, "In the way of what?"

"_The flower."_

Now Naruto was confused. He preferred it when Sasuke talked about killing Itachi because his asleep mind often came up with ridiculous plans to do so – like boiling him to death in ramen, while Naruto did not approve of using ramen for such purposes, he still found it funny.

"Um...what flower?"

"_But she won't want me...not with Kiba around." _Sasuke continued to slur in his sleep.

Naruto jumped out of his bed and ran out of the room to go and call Sakura. Sakura didn't take too kindly at being woken up in the middle of the night and she whacked Naruto over the head. "Sakura-chan, you have to come! This time it's too good to miss, he's talking in his sleep again!"

Sakura's eyes lit up and she followed Naruto to the cabin.

"_She is doing funny things to my head,"_ Sasuke said.

"Who is?" Sakura asked, now as excited as Naruto.

"_That girl, she smells nice"_

Sakura looked at Naruto for an answer but he shrugged.

"_Why is this happening to me? I don't want this to happen," _Sasuke said, voice sounding pained.

"What's happening?" Naruto shouted and Sakura hit him again.

"Don't shout! Just now you'll wake him up and then we won't find out anything!"

"_That girl is in my head."_

"What is her name? Do you have a crush on her?" Sakura asked.

"_I will crush Itachi!"_

"Uh oh, going off topic there," Naruto said in panic, at this rate they would never find out who the girl was. Although, if Naruto had paid more attention to his friend today, he might have already known.

"Sasuke-kun, tell us more about the girl," Sakura said gently, but Sasuke rolled over on to his side and started snoring softly. "Roll him onto his back and he'll start again," Naruto suggested.

"Do want him to wake up and chidori us to the moon?" Sakura asked him.

"...no."

Luckily for them Sasuke rolled over by himself and once again lay on his back.

"_What do I do?"_

"You tell us who the girl is," Naruto suggested.

"_She looked so...pretty at the party and I didn't even tell her."_

"Party?" Naruto wondered.

"Must be the shinobi party," Sakura said.

"_Yes, I know Itachi was at that party in a disguise, I should have killed him!"_

"There he goes again..." said Sakura.

"_Hinata..." _Sasuke moaned. Naruto and Sakura almost fell over.

"_Her smile makes me feel funny."_

"Do you like her?" Sakura asked breathlessly, hardly believing their luck as they got the ultimate blackmail on Sasuke should he ever try anything funny, like deserting his village.

"_Yes, I wonder if mother would have approved of her?_ _I'll never know because of Itachi, I will slaughter him!"_ Sasuke continued in his sleep, unaware of the huge hole he had just dug for himself.

"Aha! I knew it! I totally knew it!" Naruto shouted loudly. Before Sakura even had a chance to shut him up, Sasuke's eyes flew open and saw them at his bedside. They both let out a bloodcurdling scream and jumped behind Naruto's bed.

"What the hell?" Sasuke asked, rubbing his eyes.

Sakura was the first to emerge from behind the bed and Sasuke looked at her suspiciously.

"Sasuke-kun, do you...know that you, uh, talk in your sleep?"

He glared at her, "I don't."

"Yep, you do man," Naruto said, grinning quite evilly.

"We should totally help him, right Naruto?" Sakura said, with a similar grin on her face.

"Help me with what?" Sasuke asked, now feeling a bit uneasy.

"To get the girl," Naruto said.

**Oh dear, how will poor Sasuke react to his little secret being found out?**

**How do Naruto and Sakura plan to help?**

**Will Hidan ever find out who has his underpants and will Karin ever find out that the underpants don't belong to Sasuke?**

**Next Chapter: Notes gone astray...**

**A/N: The 'Suna's Blue Ocean' is a reference from Konoha's Bash.**

**If you liked this, please read 'The Ninja All Stars Tournament' by Inuyonas and I.**

**And if you haven't already read 'I was wrong' by LostInspiration312, you should! – it is one of the best SasuHina's I have ever read! **

**That's enough from me! Please review!**


	5. Notes Gone Astray

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter Five – Notes Gone Astray...**

"What girl? Stop talking nonsense idiot and go back to sleep," Sasuke said calmly, but internally he was choking and freaking out. _I talk in my sleep? I got to get rid of that problem!_

"You like Hinata-chan, you said so yourself," Sakura piped up, her green eyes sparkling with delight.

"Ridiculous," Sasuke said, but in his mind he was already bashing his head against a wall.

"Deny it all you want, but we heard you and we know your secret," Naruto said, looking mischievous.

"Well," Sasuke started, trying to come up with the perfect cover story, "In my sleep, I talk about stuff that is completely untrue and opposite to how I really feel."

"Oh, so you're telling us all those times you talked about your hatred and killing Itachi, you actually love and adore him?" Naruto asked.

"What?"

"You always used to talk about killing him in your sleep but now you've moved on to better and brighter things," Sakura said.

"Hn," said Sasuke, knowing he was cornered. _Stupid Hinata and her stupid smile, stupid face, stupid smell and stupid voice and stupid me for falling and not realising before it was too late._

"So you want our help or what?" asked Naruto.

"And why would I take advice from you two?" Sasuke asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Two reasons. You're single and we're not," Naruto answered smartly. Sasuke glared at them, hoping that they would disintegrate and then he could forget about his 'little problem' by doing some training.

"Well?" Sakura pressed.

"I don't like her," Sasuke snapped.

"Oh...okay, luckily, because she probably doesn't like you anyway. She doesn't seem to be part of your fanclub," Sakura said.

Sasuke recalled how unhappy Hinata seemed when he was picked to be her date to the shinobi party and how it irritated him that she didn't want to be his date. Plus, she had been head over heels in love with Naruto. What was up with that? He was Sasuke Uchiha for crying out loud, the desire of every woman in the Ninja Universe and beyond! The irony of it all was that he never liked all those women, but the one woman he wants, he couldn't have...or could he?

"Fine."

"Hmm? So you want help?" Naruto asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Not that I need it, but this will be an interesting venture," Sasuke mused. Naruto and Sakura giggled deviously while Sasuke looked mildly discomforted.

"So the first thing you have to do is write her a sweet note," Sakura instructed him. Naruto and Sasuke stared at her blankly.

"No," Sasuke said.

"No?"

"No."

"Why not?" Sakura asked while Naruto yawned because it was like 2am.

"I can't write lame notes and tell her outright that I like her."

"I know...that's why you leave mysterious anonymous notes until the big reveal where you sweep her off her feet!" Sakura gushed. Sasuke was already beginning to have doubts about this, but Sakura was a girl, and possibly a good source of valuable information on what girls liked. "Let me write the note for you, pen and paper please," Sakura ordered. Sasuke passed her the notepad and the pen that was in the cabin.

"Thank you. Now what is it that you like about her?"

"I don't know," Sasuke lied.

Sakura frowned at him and then began writing, when she was done, she passed it to Sasuke who snatched it up and read it. "Your beauty bedazzles my senses and sets my heart aflame from your Secret Admirer, Sasuke."

Sakura looked very proud of herself.

"Sakura, this sounds like it was written by Lee. And you can't say it's from a secret admirer and then put my name there."

"Oh give me a break, it's 2am," Sakura whined and grabbed the paper back from him.

"Ooh, you can write 'I've got my eye on you'," Naruto said, still grinning.

"Idiot, that sounds like a threat," Sasuke told him. Sakura was tapping her chin thoughtfully with the pen and the she quickly wrote something on the page and passed it to Sasuke.

"I know we've never spoken much, but I think you're really sweet and pretty, and I would like to get to know you better. From S." Sasuke read, "Sounds fine."

"Great! Now here's how it's going to happen, we keep sending notes like this to her to elevate the suspense, but you have got to interact with her everyday so that she will come to know that it is you," Sakura told him seriously, "And don't worry, Naruto and I will help you."

"...okay..." Sasuke said, a bit apprehensively, it was embarrassing for him to be enlisting help from his two teammates.

"What if she thinks that 'S' stands for stalker," Naruto wondered out loud.

"She won't. Sasuke, copy this note into your handwriting and go slip it under her door," Sakura said.

"Just give her that one," Sasuke said.

"No, she might recognize my handwriting."

Sasuke took the page and pen from her and copied out the note. It looked very illegible and Sakura shook her head, "Can't you do it neater?"

Sasuke glared at her and then proceeded to try and write more neatly, once Sakura gave the approval, the three ninja's went out into the hallway to find Hinata's door and slip the note under it. As soon as the deed was done, they sped off back to their respective rooms.

"This is so exciting, you're going to get a girlfriend you bastard, poor Hinata-chan," Naruto said playfully, hitting Sasuke on the back. Sasuke didn't retaliate because he was starting to have a bad feeling about this.

-X-

All of the Akatsuki members, minus Sasori were gathered in a boardroom on the ship because Pein had called an emergency meeting. Hidan was hoping that Pein didn't find out about him searching the rooms. "Where is Sasori? He is usually very punctual," said Konan.

Deidara shrugged, "He always leaves the room in Hiruko and doesn't come back until very late, wonder what he is up to."

Hidan had a very good idea of what Sasori was up to but he didn't say anything, which was very unlike him because normally he couldn't keep his mouth shut about things. However, this time, the idea of Sasori being the creator of the legendary 'Suna's Blue Ocean' series of puppet porn and shooting his next masterpiece on board this cruise ship seemed so insane that Hidan remained quiet about it.

Ten minutes later, Sasori arrived and sat down next to Deidara without a word. Pein cleared his throat, "I have called this meeting because the Kyubi is aboard this ship and he must be captured."

Everyone groaned, even Itachi, and Konan banged her fist on the table, "I refuse!"

"But Ko - "

"No, I wanted all of us to go on holiday together without any of this, I know you say it's a working holiday, but I changed my mind, I'm not doing any work and neither are you or the rest of them!"

"I agree with Konan-sama, **No we must obey Leader and get the Kyubi.**"

"It's just one jinchuuriki," Pein reasoned.

"Yeah, and when we try to capture him, this entire ship will be destroyed along with our holiday," Konan argued.

"Fine. We'll wait until after the cruise and then capture him," Pein said with a great sigh. All the other members had smug looks on their face.

"Oh and Itachi, your brother is also here," Sasori informed Itachi, "I saw him earlier, he took one look at me and muttered something about red hair and fled like a pansy."

Itachi nodded, "I see."

Pein cleared his throat again, he had a habit of doing that, "Konan has also brought to my attention that she is missing a certain garment and if any of you has it, it should be returned immediately."

_Uh oh..._Hidan thought.

"What garment, un?" Deidara asked.

"A feminine item," Pein said.

"Ohhhh."

"My underpants has also gone missing," Hidan informed Pein, so that he appeared to be a victim and not a suspect.

There were several sniggers which came from Deidara, Tobi and Kisame.

"I will go and speak to the cleaning staff personally, maybe it's just misplaced," Pein said. He, the great and mighty leader of the Akatsuki, was forbidden from hunting a jinchuuriki but had to tackle missing underwear dilemma's. It was sacrilege.

-X-

Karin made sure she woke up early that morning, she had a feeling that Sasuke was an early riser and therefore it would be the perfect time to run into him. "Maybe he is shy and that's why he is avoiding you," Hinata had told her last night when Karin was complaining that she could not find him anywhere. _What a sweet girl, _Karin thought, looking at her. Hinata was still sound asleep, curled up in bed. Karin liked her; she was quiet and helpful and a very good listener.

_Hehe, once I get my Sasuke, I will find her a boyfriend too, _Karin thought, spraying some perfume on herself. She stepped out of the room and looked up and down the hallway, there was no sign of anyone. _No big deal, I'll just wait a little while._ She unbuttoned a few buttons from the top of her shirt to add some sex appeal to her look. "Hehe, I'll get him this time," she said. She noticed something was stuck to the underside of her shoe and she picked it up. It was a small note scrawled on a piece of paper. Karin put her glasses back on to read it. As she read it, her eyes widened and she squealed with excitement. She ran back into the room and woke Hinata up. "W-what happened, Karin-san?"

Karin handed the note to Hinata and jumped up and down while Hinata read it.

"You were right, he is shy, that is why he wrote this note instead of coming to me face to face. Oh he is so adorable! I want to get to know him better too!" Karin said, grabbing Hinata's hands. Hinata smiled, "Yes, this must be from him, it's signed with an 'S'. He thinks you're sweet and pretty."

"And he says we haven't spoken much which is completely true!" Karin said, she was floating on a happy, blissful cloud, "I'm going to tell him that I love him right now!"

"Karin-san, wait," Hinata told her.

"Why?"

"Why don't you leave him a note too," Hinata suggested, "You can write that you like him and want to get to know him too and ask him to meet you at that restaurant for a date."

Karin looked at Hinata in awe, "You're totally right, that is genius."

"No problem," Hinata said with a bright smile. Karin wrote out her note, kissed it and then Hinata went along with her to show her where Naruto and Sasuke's cabin was so she could leave it under the door. "This is so romantic," Karin said dreamily.

-X-

"Oh Sasuke..." Naruto said as Sasuke was busy brushing and styling his hair.

"What is it?"

"You've got mail!" Naruto said, holding up the note. Sasuke snatched it from his hand and read it. "What does it say? What does it say?" Naruto asked, trying to get a look.

"It says that she likes me too and also wants to get to know me as well and we can meet and have coffee at the restaurant tonight," Sasuke said, not believing his luck It was too good to be true, Hinata didn't even seem to pay much attention to him but she stated that she liked him in the note, maybe it was just a sympathy date and she was really going to tell him to leave her alone. Sasuke shook his head, "I can't do this."

"Of course you can! Don't tell me you've never been on a date before," Naruto said.

"I haven't."

"Ah...yes. Okay, you can come along on mine and Sakura-chan's lunch date and see how it's done," Naruto told his gloomy friend.

"No, I'm not going on any date at all."

"You have to! You can't stand poor Hinata-chan up," Naruto said. Sasuke sighed, he was an Uchiha, Uchiha's could do anything, he wouldn't let himself be beaten by a mere date.

"Okay."

"Sweet, and you have nothing to worry about. Sakura-chan and I will teach you everything!"

**Next Chapter: The Date**

**Please Review!**


	6. The Date

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto**

**Chapter 6 – The Date**

**

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"Today is the day! Today I will do it!" said Kiba, standing in front of the mirror in his cabin.

"That is what you say every day," deadpanned Shino.

Kiba turned slightly red and turned towards Shino with his fists clenched, "It's not easy without the alcohol okay! Every time I'm about to say something I completely chicken out."

"Hinata is as harmless as a butterfly," Shino told him.

"I know, but what if she rejects me?" Kiba asked anxiously.

"Why would she? Naruto is off the market now so there are no obstacles in your way."

"Gee thanks Shino, way to make me feel second best," Kiba grumbled, "So here's the plan, you tell her to come to the restaurant for a team meeting tonight - "

"I told her that yesterday…and you failed to tell her."

"Naruto and that jerk Sasuke showed up and distracted me!"

"Fine, I will inform her…"

"Great! So how are things with Ino?" Kiba asked his friend, who had been dating Ino for a few days now ever since the night of the shinobi party.

"We broke up," Shino said simply.

Kiba looked flabbergasted, "What? Why?"

"She talks…a lot and she is unbearably loud," Shino said.

"Whoa…when I dated her I didn't notice that," Kiba said with a thoughtful look on his face.

"That's because you're both loud and talkative."

* * *

Meanwhile Ino, far from being sad over the breakup, already found a new target. He was really tall, had a great body and seemed different than all the other guys that she had dated before. Ino and Jugo were relaxing in the sun on the upper deck and the orange-haired guy was smoking a joint. He noticed Ino gawking at him and said, "Keeps me calm…otherwise I have killer tendencies and I become…different."

_Oh my God that is so hot! _Ino thought. "That is interesting," she said with a giggle.

"Yeah…so what do you do?" Jugo asked.

"I am training to be the best medic-nin and I'm an expert at mind transfer jutsu's," Ino told him, evidently she loved talking about herself.

"That's hot…"

"What's hot?" Ino asked, still in her flirtatious tone.

"The sun yo. Can't we go stand in the shade?"

"Um…oh okay, let's go," Ino said and they moved to a shadier area and Jugo lay on a pool chair and closed his eyes. Ino lay on hers in a seductive position to try and get his attention again but he appeared to be in his own world, "So what else do you want to know about me…"

Jugo opened one eye, "Uhhh…hobbies?"

"I like shopping and arranging flowers!"

"Cool."

"You think so?" Ino asked.

"Totally, we should go out in the sun again."

A pulse was throbbing on Ino's forehead, she used to have much better conversations with Shino than with this guy. _How dare that bug-brain break up with me! _Ino thought, _I really liked that fool! _Okay, apparently Ino did feel bad about the breakup.

"Jugo! What are you doing lazing around? I have important news!" yelled a screechy female voice. Ino turned to see a red-haired girl with glasses accompanied by another guy with white hair who was sipping from a water bottle. "Who is she?" the girl asked, pointing rudely to Ino.

Jugo squinted at Ino, "Uhhh…what you say your name was again?"

Ino growled angrily and stomped away. _I've had it with men! _

Yeah right.

"So what's the news?" Jugo asked.

"Sasuke and I are going on a date tonight!" Karin squealed, "After I'm through with him tonight he'll be dying to come with us to Orochimaru, and then we can be together forever!"

Karin showed Jugo and Suigetsu the note. Suigetsu burst out laughing after he read it, "He thinks _you're _sweet and pretty? He needs to get his head checked!"

Karin was in a good mood so she didn't give Suigetsu the beating of his life, instead her eyes were glazed over and she looked like she was daydreaming.

"Mine and Sasuke's babies will be beautiful_, _strong and smart," Karin said.

"And also imaginary," Suigetsu mumbled.

* * *

After hours of being fussed over by Sakura, Sasuke was finally ready for his date with Hinata. He had refused to wear a full suit and was now dressed in a pair of black pants and a short-sleeved white shirt with the Uchiha symbol on it.

Earlier on in the day, he was subjected to Naruto and Sakura's lunch date where they fawned over each other the whole time, making Sasuke feel ill. Hinata wasn't expecting him to act like that, was she? Because he wouldn't do that even if someone offered to bring him Itachi bound and gagged in a cage.

"So remember, laugh at all her jokes even if they aren't funny, tell her that her hair looks nice – oh, oh! Tell her that she looks beautiful!" Naruto was saying.

Sasuke sighed, he had wanted to cancel the date all day but every time Hinata's face would appear in his mind, so sweet and innocent, that he couldn't bring himself to stand her up.

Why oh why did his hormones have to start tingling now?

"…and don't glare at her, try to smile. Can you smile, Sasuke?" Naruto asked.

"Of course I can, idiot."

"Show me."

"No."

"Just show me!"

Sasuke reluctantly smiled – but it looked more like a snarl.

"Okay, don't smile," Naruto advised and Sasuke scowled at him.

"And don't do that either," Naruto warned him, "And you must also - "

"Yeah, yeah, I got it, pay for the food and walk her to her cabin and tell her that I had a great time," Sasuke said wearily.

"You forgot something," Naruto pointed out.

"What?"

"You say that you would love to do it again sometime and arrange another date!"

"Oh, right."

"You're not taking this seriously, you bastard! Hinata is such a nice girl and she actually likes a jerk like you, you should be grateful!" Naruto yelled, causing Sasuke's eyes to widen slightly in surprise.

* * *

Hinata was helping Karin get ready for the date with Sasuke as Karin didn't have anything to wear. Karin was wearing a deep purple dress of Hinata's that came mid-thigh but the front was loose because Karin wasn't as lucky in the boobs department as Hinata.

"M-maybe we can stuff some tissue in?" Hinata suggested.

"Good idea!" Karin said, getting a huge wad of tissues and pushing them into her bra until she properly filled out the dress. "You think I should lose the glasses?" she asked Hinata.

"I don't know…I think they make you look cute," Hinata said with a smile.

Karin giggled brainlessly, "I'm ready!"

"I-I'll come with you. I have to meet my teammates there as well," Hinata said. Lately, Shino had been scheduling a lot of team meetings to which he didn't show up. Kiba had also been acting pretty weird; he always seemed nervous and on edge around her.

"That's great, I need the moral support," Karin said. The two girls left for the restaurant, chatting animatedly to one another. When they got to the restaurant, Karin stopped to talk to two boys who Hinata assumed were her teammates.

"Whoa, you actually look decent, Karin," Suigetsu said, with a toothy grin, "And who are you, gorgeous?"

Hinata blushed and stepped back.

"She's my awesome roommate, Hinata," Karin said.

"Nice to meet you, Hinata, I'm Suigetsu."

"N-nice to meet you too, Suigetsu-san. I'll see you inside, Karin-chan, good luck on your date!" Hinata said, and she entered the restaurant, looking for her two teammates. She spotted Kiba sitting alone and made her way over to him.

* * *

Sasuke chose a table where he had a good view of the entrance to the restaurant, actually, Naruto and Sakura insisted that he sit there so Hinata could see where he was when she arrived. He had been waiting for fifteen minutes and Hinata was a no-show. He also really needed to use the bathroom.

Finally he saw her arrive and his breath caught in his throat and he gripped the edge of the table. Hinata looked around the restaurant but didn't look his way. He saw her smile and head over to another table where Kiba was sitting. _What the hell? _Sasuke wondered, _Maybe there's a reasonable explanation, maybe she is just going to greet him and stuff, he is her teammate after all. Then she'll come here. Hmm. That gives me time to go to the bathroom quickly._

He quickly woke up and went to the bathroom to relieve himself and he was glad he did because when he got back he got the shock of his young life.

"Hi Sa-su-ke," the red haired stalker girl said, pronouncing his name so lustfully it gave him the chills and not the good kind of chills.

Sasuke was frozen and staring at her.

"Hehe, don't stare at me like that, you're making me shy," she said, grabbing his hand and pushing him into his seat. Sasuke finally found his voice.

"Who the hell are you?" he whispered angrily.

"It's Karin you silly boy," she said, swatting his hand playfully, "I hope I didn't keep you waiting long."

"There must be a mistake," Sasuke said.

"No there isn't, you want to get to know me better, so let's get started," she said, leaning over the table.

Sasuke leaned so far back on his chair that it was in danger of capsizing.

"That note was so sweet it made me melt," Karin said, batting her eyelashes at him.

Sasuke looked appalled. "Note? You got a note from me?"

"Mmhmm," Karin said.

"Doesn't Hinata Hyuga stay in cabin 17?" Sasuke asked.

"Yes…she's my roommate," Karin said.

_Oh God NO!_ he was in deep shit now. _Damn Naruto and Sakura and their stupid advice! So Hinata doesn't even like me…_

He pushed that thought aside for now and concentrated on the problem at hand. He had to think fast and think of something good to get this psychotic chick away from him.

"That note was a prank, I don't really like you," Sasuke told her.

Karin didn't look the least bit perturbed, "Oh Sasuke, still playing hard to get even after you admitted to your feelings for me! You're too adorable...it just makes me want to have my way with you right now!"

Karin lunged at him and gripped his shoulders and her face was moving closer to his.

* * *

Hinata was sitting and listening to Kiba talk about the weather and other vague topics when she finally asked, "Where's Shino-kun?"

Kiba looked startled, "Eh? Oh! Shino!"

Hinata looked worriedly at him, "Is something wrong, Kiba-kun? You h-haven't been yourself lately."

Kiba hung his head, "Hinata…there's something I've – well, you see…"

Hinata waited patiently and gave him a tender smile of encouragement.

"I've been making Shino schedule these team meetings so that I could talk to you about something," Kiba blurted out.

"A-about what?" Hinata asked.

"Hinata I L - "

BANG!

Kiba stopped mid-sentence and both he and Hinata turned to see what had caused the noise. There was quite a commotion happening on the other side of the restaurant. A table was broken in half and a chair was toppled over on the floor. They saw Sasuke lying on the ground with a girl straddling him. He pushed the girl off him and bolted out of the restaurant.

"What the…?" Kiba said.

"Sasuke wait! We didn't get to kiss yet!" Karin yelled. But Sasuke was long gone.

"Oh no, I need to go see if she is okay," Hinata said in concern for her roommate.

"Huh? Hinata, wait, I need to tell you something," Kiba said, but Hinata was already gone to see if Karin was okay.

"Damn," Kiba said, punching the table, making the glasses rattle.

* * *

**Will Kiba ever get a chance to tell Hinata how he feels or will Sasuke beat him to it?**

**Will Sasuke ever recover from his first date?**

**Next Chapter: First Attempt – The Rescue**

**I had a poem prepared for Karin to read to Sasuke on the date, called 'Ode to Sasuke'. It was basically a really dirty parody of an old song so I didn't put it in or the rating for the story would have to go up to M. But if you request it, I may include it in another chapter!**

**Please Review!**


	7. Attempt 1 The Rescue

**Big thank you for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto**

**Chapter 7 – Attempt one – The rescue**

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_Must run, must get away! She could be right behind me! _Sasuke ran for his life, not caring where he was running to, all that mattered was getting away from that crazy chick. When he finally ran out breath, he stopped in a deserted end of the ship and panted over the railing.

Taking a deep breath of the crisp ocean air, he turned around and saw strange shadows moving rhythmically on the wall. Deciding to investigate, he moved closer and peered around the corner. What he saw would further scar him for the rest of the trip.

"You again," Sasori said, immediately noticing him.

"What the _hell _are you doing?" Sasuke asked, open-mouthed and wide-eyed.

The red-haired puppet master had chakra strings connected to a puppet which he was making engage in an unspeakable act with another puppet. Sasori gave Sasuke a sleepy-eyed smirk and picked up a tape and threw it at Sasuke. "Knock yourself out."

Sasuke caught it and backed away slowly, after he was more than twenty feet away from Sasori, he broke into a run again and threw the tape overboard. _Red-heads are seriously deranged, _Sasuke thought as he made his way back to his cabin.

"Oh Naruto that's the spot right there," he heard Sakura's voice from inside the cabin and paused in front of the door.

"How does that feel, Sakura-chan?" he heard Naruto ask.

Sasuke was sweating, what were his friends doing in there?

"Mmmm, you're a strong guy, put more muscle into it," Sakura said.

_Oh shit! They must have thought I'd come back late from the date and now they're in there doing god knows what! _Sasuke thought.

"Is that hard enough for you?" Naruto asked with a grunt.

Before Sakura could answer, Sasuke flung open the cabin door and stood in the doorway, staring at them with a totally lost look on his face. Naruto and Sakura stared him; Naruto was paused holding Sakura's foot in his hand while Sakura was lying back on the bed, looking at a magazine.

"Foot massage?" Sasuke asked quietly.

"Yeah! But I'm not going to give _you _one," Naruto said.

Sasuke sighed and closed the door behind him and tiredly sat down on his bed.

_At this rate I'm going to lose my mind, _Sasuke thought grimly.

"So how did the date go?" Sakura asked, sitting up and looking at him expectantly.

Sasuke didn't answer, he really didn't want to recount the awful tale.

"You screwed it up didn't you!" Naruto shouted.

"Shut up."

"I knew it!" Naruto said, "All of our hard work and effort down the drain!"

"What happened?" Sakura asked Sasuke gently.

Sasuke closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "Turns out Hinata's roommate got the note and thought it was for her…"

"So…that girl showed up on the date?" Sakura asked.

Sasuke nodded.

"That means Hinata doesn't like you!" Naruto laughed. Sakura smacked him on the shoulder.

"It's not a train smash!" Sakura assured Sasuke, "We just have to come up with another plan!"

"No, no more plans. I…give up."

"What do you mean _give up_? I thought you were Uchiha Sasuke and those words weren't in your vocabulary!" Naruto said.

"Wow Naruto, I didn't know that the word vocabulary was in your vocabulary," Sasuke retorted.

"Sasuke-kun, he's right. Since when do you give up?" Sakura asked.

"I saw her with Kiba tonight," Sasuke told them, and then he added quite miserably, "She didn't even look my way."

Sasuke cursed himself in his mind for being pathetic, he never allowed himself to show weakness – Uchiha's weren't weak!

"So what? This is a challenge! A challenge! Not a fangirl who is going to fall into your lap – you have to work for this one, and besides, the ones you have to work for are the ones that are worth it," Naruto said, beaming at Sakura who blushed.

_They're right…but I'm usually trying to get a girl to _not _fall for me… but how do I get one to fall for me? _Sasuke thought.

* * *

The Akatsuki were gathered in the boardroom once again and Pein stood at the front; all the members were chatting amongst themselves and not paying attention to him. Pein cleared his throat noisily – with members like these it's no wonder that he had developed such a bad habit.

"Sorry, Leader-sama," Itachi said.

"That's alright. In fact, I'm glad you all are bonding like this because I've organised team building exercises," Pein announced.

"Why the fuck would you do that?" Hidan asked.

"Well, if we learn to cooperate and work together, we will be more efficient in our endeavours to capture the Jinchuuriki and achieve world peace," Pein said.

"World peace?" Kisame asked.

"Er I mean domination, world domination!" Pein said quickly, "So the first one is for you to fill out this questionnaire about your partner." He passed around the questionnaires, and each member took one.

"Great, can we go now?" Hidan asked.

"Why are you in such a hurry?" Sasori asked.

"I need to give these out," Hidan said, holding up a thick stack of flyers.

Deidara took one and examined it, there was a picture of a pair of white spankies bearing the Jashin symbol, "Undies missing, please return to Hidan at cabin 75 or you'll be saying goodbye to your vital organs and hello to the afterlife."

Kisame, Deidara and Konan began laughing at Hidan.

"You actually made an advertisement for your _underpants_!" Kisame laughed, tears falling from his eyes.

"Fuck you fish-face! They happen to be expensive unlike your cheap underwater creature boxers!" Hidan yelled.

"Hahahahah – hey wait, how do you know what kind of underpants I wear?"

"Um…just a guess…it's really fucking obvious you know," Hidan covered, "Anyway, turn the flyer over."

Deidara turned it over and there was a picture of the Jashin symbol, some bloodstain effects and a photograph of Hidan with a speech bubble saying, "Convert to Jashinism now and get extraordinary benefits such as immortality and awesomeness."

They laughed even harder.

"Yeah, you laugh now…but soon Jashinists will take over!" Hidan said, "I'm out of here, I have to give these out."

"Er…right, you are all dismissed and I expect these to be handed in tomorrow," Pein warned them.

Hidan made his way to the busiest portion of the ship and began handing out the flyers to the passangers. Some looked at him in horror, some in disdain and some laughed…depending on which side of the flyer they read first.

His job was finally done when he had only one flyer left, "That's a job well done – spreading the word of Jashin-sama to these fools!" he cackled and walked back in the direction of the cabins when he spotted two young girls walking together.

"Embrace Jashinism!" he said to the red-haired girl and handed her the flyer.

* * *

Karin and Hinata were walking back to their cabin. Hinata was concerned about Karin because the girl hadn't said a word to her yet. When they got inside the cabin, Karin squashed the flyer that the silver-haired guy had given to her, threw it in the trash without even looking at it and sat down on her bed and hung her head.

"K-Karin-chan? Are you okay?"

Karin looked up with a wide grin on her face, "Of course I am! I just went on a date with Sasuke Uchiha and we nearly kissed…oh I could tell that he really wanted to but he was so shy…"

"But it was m-mean of him to just run off like that," Hinata said, then she remembered that she had also just deserted Kiba right when he was about to say something to her. She bit her lip, she could make it up to him tomorrow somehow.

"I don't mind…it's a turn on to know that he's so shy in front of me," Karin said while Hinata blushed at that comment.

"So who was that cutie you were out with? Any sparks there?" Karin asked.

Hinata's cheeks were rosy as she replied, "T-that's j-just my teammate K-Kiba-kun! W-we're f-friends."

"Then why are you stuttering and blushing so much?" Karin asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

_Oh why am I heating up like this, _Hinata thought. These feelings were only present whenever she was around Naruto, how could it be that the mere mention of Kiba could be invoking them now?

* * *

"Naruto, why in the ninja universe are we hiding behind these cargo boxes?" Sasuke asked.

"We're staking out the prey!" Naruto said. Both boys were dressed in swimming shorts; Naruto's was an eye-aching shade of orange and Sasuke's was dark blue. Sakura was dressed in a pink bikini top and had shorts on. They were near the pool, hiding behind huge cargo boxes, spying on Hinata who was sitting on a poolside chair reading a book.

Sasuke couldn't help but take in every aspect of her appearance. She was wearing an orange one-piece swimsuit but a white sarong was tied around her waist. _Why is it orange? _Sasuke wondered, giving Naruto a dirty look in the process.

"What's that look for?" Naruto asked.

"…nothing."

He went back to ogling Hinata, the girl had curves in all the right places and an amazing set of – _wait, hold on…I will not think of such an innocent girl in that way. _Yet his heart was hammering in a way that made his breathing heavy. Hinata suddenly turned over giving him a view of her incredible – _no stop it, this is just wrong!_

"Something wrong Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked.

"No," Sasuke said, his voice came out hoarse.

"Let's go over the plan one more time – operation charm Hinata!" Sakura said, "I will cause the accident and Sasuke you will act her as her rescuer."

"I'll be giving the signal," Naruto said.

"And again I will ask, how is this going to help?" Sasuke asked.

"Trust me, girls dig the heroics," Naruto told him, "Save a girl in a life-threatening situation and she will fall for you!"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"It's the superhero effect!" Naruto said.

"There's no such thing, idiot."

"There is!"

"Naruto and gang, what troublesome thing are you doing now?" asked Shikamaru who just showed up with Temari.

"Oh hey Shikamaru! We're just helping Sasuke here score with Hinata because he likes her - " Naruto managed to say before Sasuke clamped his hand over Naruto's mouth.

"Hamphshoffshewbashtrd!" (Hands off you bastard) Naruto yelled, punching at Sasuke causing them to fall over and roll out from behind the boxes. Sakura smacked her forehead and looked up at the sky as if to ask, "Why God, why?"

"The great Uchiha has fallen for the Hyuga princess?" Shikamaru asked incredulously.

"Are Uchiha's and Hyuga's even allowed to mate let alone date?" Temari asked.

Sakura shrugged. The boys continued to roll around and fight.

"You - don't – just – blurt – it – out – to – everyone!" Sasuke said, trying to punch Naruto who was under him.

"Get off me you jerk!" Naruto screamed.

Neji and Tenten walked past on their way to the pool, noticing the scuffle.

"I always knew that Sasuke was gay…" Neji commented.

* * *

Hinata looked up from her book at the source of all the screams and curse words. She blushed when she saw that Sasuke was on top of Naruto. She thought back to the day when they first became genin's and how Sasuke had stolen Naruto's first kiss…it had made her so mad, she had wanted to rip the lips off Sasuke's face.

However, she didn't make a fuss that day because Sasuke's fangirls outnumbered her…and she didn't want to be responsible for so many deaths.

Hinata just smiled at the memory and looked at Kiba and Shino who were chilling in the pool. Kiba was splashing Shino's sunglasses in an attempt to make him take them off. Hinata giggled at them and went back to her book.

A few minutes later, Sakura had come up to her. "Hey Hinata-chan!"

"Hello Sakura-chan," Hinata greeted.

"Nice weather," Sakura said, and then laughed.

"It's perfect," Hinata said.

"Why don't we dip our legs in the pool?" Sakura suggested.

"Okay," Hinata said, waking up from the chair.

"We have so much to talk about!" Sakura gushed.

"W-we do?"

They neared the pool, "Sure we do!" Sakura said excitedly and then using just the right amount of her brute strength, she bumped Hinata into the pool before the poor girl even knew what happened to her.

"NOW!" Naruto yelled.

Sasuke dived into the pool and placed his arms securely around Hinata's waist, bringing her above the water. Her hair was plastered all over her face and over her eyes, she frantically pushed her hair away and stared up at Sasuke with those enchanting eyes – now looking shocked. "S-S-Sasuke! W-what are you-" she sputtered, noticing that his hands were on her body.

"Are you okay?" Sasuke asked, trying to appear cool even though he was close to passing out because Hinata's amazing, half-naked, wet body was against his.

"I-I'm f-fine! Y-you can l-let go, p-please…um…I can swim…"

Sasuke immediately let go as if he had touched a hot stove top.

Hinata swam away, looking graceful in the water.

"Yeah Uchiha, I taught her how to doggy paddle a long time ago," Kiba said with a grin.

Naruto turned to Sakura, "Ooops. I didn't factor in if she could swim or not."

Sakura groaned.

Sasuke let himself sink underwater, feeling terribly embarrassed.

Attempt one – the rescue – failure!

* * *

**What will Sasuke try next?**

**Can Naruto and Sakura come up with a plan that will actually work?**

**Next Chapter: Attempt two – the casual run-in. **

**A/N: Yay! I finally updated this…I'm not that happy with this chapter…it seemed so much more funnier in my head…oh well.**

**Oh, and the attempt was meant to be clichéd! **

**As for Karin's Ode to Sasuke…it WILL come up in a later chapter…**

**Please review!**


	8. Attempt 2  The Casual RunIn

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! And to Moon-Forest, your questions will be answered at the end of the chapter!**

**Chapter 8 – Attempt Two – The Casual Run-In**

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"Hey Kakashi, what you got there?" Asuma asked as he walked into the room and saw his roommate kneeling by the video machine. The silver-haired jonin looked up at Asuma and motioned for him to take a seat.

"I found this videotape yesterday. I haven't had a chance to look at it yet," Kakashi said.

"Where did you find it?" Asuma asked, lighting a cigarette.

"Was just sitting by the window and I saw it falling down so using my awesome ninja skills I caught it – I think someone tried to throw it overboard."

"Then it's either really good or really bad," Asuma summed up, "Let's watch it."

Just as Kakashi hit play, Kurenai came through the door, "Come on you two, we have to address the kids about that matter that Tsunade told us about."

She was standing in the doorway, holding her back because her stomach had gotten really huge and it looked like she would be due to give birth at any time. Kakashi switched the tape off and woke up, Asuma walked over to Kurenai and gave her a peck on the lips, caressing her tummy. "Please can we get Hinata or Neji to use their byakugan and check if it is a boy or a girl," Asuma pleaded with her.

"No! I want it to be a surprise…" Kurenai told him. They argued about it until they reached the ninja who were waiting for them in the same boardroom that the Akatsuki had been using.

Kakashi observed his three students; Sakura and Naruto were arguing and Sasuke was sitting glumly occasionally glancing at something and frowning. Kakashi followed Sasuke's trail of vision and smiled a devious smile, under his mask of course.

"Youthful students!" Gai began to address them, "We have especially good news for you today! Take it away my rival!"

"We will be arriving at our first destination shortly – the first of five islands which you will be visiting and Tsunade-sama has asked for you to all participate in the opening of the new hot springs resort which will be a masquerade party," Kakashi told them.

There was a unanimous groan from the teenagers.

"Seriously? _Another _party? What is up with Tsunade-sama?" Shikamaru asked.

Asuma ignored him and carried on, "Anyone with a problem will be shipped straight back to Konoha. So anybody wanna say anything?"

There was silence.

"It's good that we understand one another."

Sakura and Naruto, having forgotten about their bickering, gave each other cunning smiles which did not go unnoticed by Sasuke.

"Good job handling the kids, Asuma, never knew you had it in you," Kakashi commented on their way back to their cabin.

"Yeah, man I'm just really stressed out with Kurenai and the baby," Asuma said.

"Isn't that why you've been smoking twice the usual amount?"

"Sometimes that isn't even enough, Kakashi."

"Let's watch that tape when we get back, I'm itching to know what's on it that someone would throw it overboard."

* * *

Ino walked up to Sakura who was walking hand-in-hand with Naruto, she took a deep breath and spoke, "Hi…Sakura."

"Hello Ino."

"Can I speak with you…alone?" Ino asked, biting her lip. Sakura turned to Naruto and then back at Ino. "Um sure, Naruto you go on ahead and tackle Shikamaru and Sasuke about what we discussed."

"I'm on it Sakura-chan!" Naruto said, kissing her cheek and dashing off to catch up to Sasuke who looked like he was trying to make a quick getaway.

"So what is it?" Sakura asked the blonde girl who looked really nervous. This was surprising since Ino was always confident and greeted Sakura with a biting comment every time they were together.

"You know I dated Kiba for a while right?" Ino finally said, looking at everything else besides Sakura. Sakura nodded and wondered what Ino was on about and whether any blackmail opportunities would arise.

"And recently I dated Shino who broke up with me – um, I mean _I_ broke up with _him,_" Ino continued.

"What is your point?" Sakura asked tiredly, she had other matters to attend to – like hooking Sasuke up with Hinata.

"The point is I thought that I really liked Shino but while I've been thinking these past few days and hitting on other guys – uh, _them _hitting on _me_, I realise that I actually still like Kiba…a lot."

Sakura frowned, "Wait, what? I thought you were supposedly in love with Sasuke-kun?"

"Oh come on Sakura that was once a upon a time ago!"

"No, if I remember correctly you were begging to go with him to the Shinobi party…"

"Like I said, ancient history and besides, we both know we are girls that crave excitement, laughter and fun…and well, Sasuke-kun is stiff and boring as much as it hurts me to say so."

"Wow Ino-pig, you've matured. But what are you telling me all this for?" Sakura asked.

"Well Forehead, it shames me to admit it, but I need your help. You see, I've been trying to talk to Kiba but he just doesn't seem at all interested in me. I know, unbelievable right?"

"Oh I think I know the reason why…" Sakura whispered, as the wheels in her head already started to turn and she gave Ino a bright smile, "I'll help you, Ino."

* * *

Naruto was standing in front of a small white board propped on the dresser while Sasuke and Shikamaru were sitting on the edge of the bed and glaring at the blonde who had a serious face on. "Naruto, where did you get that board from?" Shikamaru asked.

"I borrowed it from the boardroom. Don't worry, I'll return it later," Naruto assured him. He turned and wrote Sasuke's name on the board and next to it he wrote Hinata with a question mark next to her name. "Right now the possibility of the two of you being together is about as impossible as me becoming a rogue ninja," Naruto said, "But you shouldn't give up."

"Who said anything about giving up? Now I really want this, I just don't want any interferences from you, Sakura or anyone," Sasuke told him.

Naruto started laughing hysterically, "No, seriously Sasuke, you need all the help you can get which is why I decided to call in the best strategist ever – so he can help us come up with a plan of action."

Shikamaru stood up and took the marker from Naruto, "So what we know about Hinata is that she is not part of your fanclub, therefore, your looks and power don't matter. Which means…Hinata probably likes guys with good personalities."

"And that would mean you're pretty much screwed, Sasuke," Naruto added.

Sasuke twitched.

"Not to worry, that's what we're here for. To give you a fighting chance," Naruto said with a thumbs-up.

"Idiot, all your ideas so far have ruined things more than improving the situation," Sasuke grumbled.

"I have a better plan," said Shikamaru, "What you need to do is stage a casual run-in with her then get to talking."

Naruto handed Sasuke a headset and he stared at it in bewilderment, "I borrowed these from Gai-sensei!"

"As troublesome as this is going to be, we will give you assistance via the headset," Shikamaru continued, "We will tell you the correct things to say so that you don't appear like the aloof bastard that you are."

Sasuke twitched again.

"In or out?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke considered this, weighed the pro's and the cons, went over the various scenarios that could go wrong, contemplated the consequences, calculated the probability of this being a success and then gave his answer, "I'm in."

* * *

Sasuke was fixing the headset so that it was hidden by his hair and his collar, he nearly jump out of his skin when he heard Naruto's voice shout into his ear, "I can't wait to hit the hotsprings!" Naruto said excitedly as they were standing in their room at the resort. Sasuke once again had the misfortune of being paired with Naruto.

"Turn the volume down you moron!"

"Oh, sorry," Naruto chuckled, and lowered the volume on his headset. Shikamaru came strolling in, carrying two pairs of binoculars, he handed one to Naruto. "Naruto…that's not to use for spying on the girls in the hotsprings," Shikamaru warned him.

"I'm not like the pervy sage!" Naruto said in indignation.

"Whatever…Sasuke, now is your chance, I spotted her standing alone and watching the fish in the koi pond," Shikamaru told him. Sasuke nodded and after making sure all their equipment was in working order, they headed towards the koi pond. Naruto and Shikamaru made sure that they were hidden behind a statue of a mermaid.

Sasuke sauntered towards Hinata and he suddenly felt rather nervous, like he was about to face a daunting opponent. His palms were getting sweaty and his knee twitched involuntarily. The air around him felt like it was trying to choke him. Finally, he approached her and she turned around when she heard him.

"Hello, Sasuke-kun," she said with a sweet smile.

Sasuke just stared at her, mouth open and face blank.

"_Say hello back!" _he heard Naruto through the headset.

"Oh, hi," Sasuke said blandly.

"How are you?"

"_Say I'm good now that you're here!" _Naruto told him.

"I'm good now that you're here," Sasuke said in a monotone voice.

Hinata looked confused.

"_Naruto! Stop giving him lame lines. Sasuke, ask her how she is!" _Shikamaru said.

"How she is? I mean, how are you?" Sasuke stammered.

"I-I'm good thank you. So you also like koi ponds?" Hinata asked, still smiling pleasantly, "I think that they are really beautiful and so calming…this place seems very relaxing. What do you think?"

_Oh my God, how did she get so chatty? Since when could she talk this much? _Sasuke wondered, thinking of what to say.

"_Tell her the pond is not as beautiful as her!"_

"The pond is not as beautiful as her," Sasuke repeated.

"As who?" Hinata asked.

Sasuke mentally slapped himself. Naruto and Shikamaru were laughing despite the situation.

"My…uh, mom," Sasuke covered.

Hinata gazed at him with that innocent stare, "That's s-sweet. That's how I feel about my mom too."

"Me too," Sasuke said absentmindedly.

"Y-you never met my mom," Hinata said, growing more confused.

"Uhm…uh…what…uh I meant was, I want to try and get to know you," Sasuke said, his face was heating up rapidly.

"_Good job! Now say, you wanna know her soul!" _Naruto said.

"I want to know your soul."

"_Stop telling him lame lines Naruto! Sasuke, from now on, listen to me!" _Shikamaru said.

"_My lines are not lame!" _

"_Sasuke, tell her that you're kidding, quickly, before she thinks you're a freak," _Shikamaru told him.

"I was kidding, Hinata," Sasuke said, in a serious voice.

Hinata visibly relaxed and laughed, "How has your trip been so far?"

Sasuke shoved his hands into his pockets because they began to tremor.

"_Say it's been great so far and you're just a little bored now. That'll open up the way for you to ask if she would like to hang out with you," _Shikamaru said.

Sasuke took his hands out of his pocket and raised them up behind his head to try and appear cool and bored, but he accidently knocked the headset off and it fell into the pond.

Naruto and Shikamaru looked at each other with horrified expressions.

Sasuke grabbed Hinata's arm and led her away from the pond before she could notice.

"It's uh, great so far. I'm just a little bored. Are you hungry? Let's have lunch," Sasuke said without pausing to take a break. Poor unassuming Hinata just nodded and allowed him to drag her along to look for a place to eat. She wondered why Sasuke was going through all this trouble to talk to her – then it hit her like a chidori – he probably wanted her help to talk to Karin and apologise about his behaviour on the date.

They sat down at a café and a waiter presented them with menu's. Sasuke was glad to have the menu as a distraction because he had no idea what to do next.

"Hinata!" came a loud, obnoxious voice. Sasuke wanted to punch the owner of this voice, "And Sasuke, hello, what are you two up to?"

Kiba was grinning at them but Sasuke noticed that his eyes were burning with jealousy. Sasuke couldn't help but smirk suggestively.

"Just having lunch, Kiba-kun. You want to join us?" Hinata offered, making Sasuke groan inwardly. He hoped that Kiba would know better and decline the offer.

"Nah, I'm going off to the store. Do you need anything, Hinata?" Kiba asked.

"No thank you," Hinata said.

"And you, Sasuke?" Kiba asked, trying to be all nice-guy in front of Hinata. Sasuke would have loved nothing more than to fry him up with a great fireball technique.

"Some privacy would be nice," Sasuke replied coolly.

"Heh. I'll check if they have some sarcasm too but it's probably stale since you supply them with it," Kiba countered.

"You better run, dog-boy," Sasuke said in a low voice.

"Or what?"

"Kiba-kun, Sasuke-kun, p-please don't fight," Hinata said.

The boys stopped glaring at each other and looked at her worried, confused and pleading face.

"Sorry Hinata, I'll be going now," Kiba said, and left, but not before giving Sasuke a look that said _I know what you're up to and this isn't over._

_

* * *

_

**Kiba is on to Sasuke!**

**Who will be the one to outwit, outplay and outlast the other in the battle for Miss Hyuga's heart?**

**How is Sakura going to help Ino?**

**And what of the upcoming masquerade ball?**

**Next Chapter: Attempt 3 – The Shirtless Uchiha**

**A/N: Not my best work…so sorry.**

**Please review!**

**Moon-Forest: Hinata isn't being spiteful by helping Karin…lol, she just doesn't know any better and doesn't realise yet that Sasuke is into her.**

**The picture Itachi has is not of Rin, it's Kiba's sister, Hana Inuzuka.**

**Zetsu eats people so you can guess where the bad smell is coming from…**


	9. Attempt 3 The Shirtless Uchiha

**Warning: Ode to Sasuke ahead!**

**Disclaimer: Naruto is not owned by me! And neither is Bryan Adam's 'Everything I do (I do it for you)'**

**Chapter 9 – Attempt 3- The Shirtless Uchiha**

**

* * *

**

Naruto, Sakura and Shikamaru were sitting in Naruto's room at the resort with their thinking faces on. Sasuke was sitting with his head in his hands. "So let me get this straight, you ate lunch with her, but the whole time neither of you spoke to each other?" Shikamaru asked, "That is such a drag, how is the relationship going to work even if you two do get together?"

Sasuke opted not to answer this question, he was deep in thought, it was not acceptable for him to be acting in such a pathetic manner. He was an Uchiha goddammit! That was probably the tenth time that he reassured himself with that thought. He was born with the built-in gene of capturing a woman's heart – but what if the Hyuga's had a built in gene to be resistant to Uchiha's? Nah, now that was just a silly thought. Also, there was no way he was going to lose to an Inuzuka who smelled like a dog and didn't bother to comb his hair.

"Sakura," Sasuke said suddenly, making the pink haired girl look up at him, "When you were a fangirl, what did you like about me?"

Sakura tapped her chin thoughtfully, "Definitely your looks, power and cold attitude – but what's one woman's chocolate cake is another woman's broccoli…"

"True, we know that Hinata likes loud, feisty, nice guys," Shikamaru said, looking pointedly at Naruto.

"Don't even bother, he still doesn't get it…" Sasuke said wearily.

"Doesn't get what?" Naruto asked, looking from Shikamaru to Sasuke.

"Naruto! Give Sasuke some nice guy lessons," Sakura said quickly.

"I won't be able to do this alone, Sakura-chan, we may need Lee too!"

"Oh hell no!" Sasuke told them.

"Why not, remember how he did that cool thing with him winking hearts at me? Imagine if he taught you to do that, think Hinata would be impressed?" Sakura asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

Sasuke had the mental image of him winking hearts at Hinata, while she blushed at him and collapsed. He shuddered, "That's not going to work."

"Why don't you just be yourself? You may have better luck and besides, making her fall for a not so true version of yourself will be troublesome…" Shikamaru warned.

"He's right…" Sakura said.

"You should just go up to her and give her the kiss of her life," Naruto suggested.

"He'd probably get the shit jyuuken'd out of him…" Shikamaru said tiredly, "Anyway, Sasuke, I suggest you hurry up and ask her to the masquerade ball before Kiba does."

"And you should be creative about it so she'll realise that you're into her, because for some reason she doesn't seem to realise that you're going out of your way to get her attention," Sakura told him.

"That's because she thinks I like that weird red-haired chick," Sasuke said solemnly.

"Sakura-chan, as a girl, what do you suggest would work on Hinata?" Naruto asked.

It was quiet as Sakura thought about this, after a few minutes she grinned broadly at the three boys, "Wait for her in her room with a bunch of flowers and then ask her. We could keep her busy until you're ready."

"That sounds good, but I think we have to kick it up a gear and try the naked man!" Naruto exclaimed.

"Uhm…the naked man?" Shikamaru asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I heard pervy sage talking about it while we were travelling. He said it works two out of three times. How it works is the guy takes his clothes off in the room and poses while the lady is out and waits for her to come back. Then if she is happy with what she sees, she'll sleep with him!" Naruto told them, smiling cheekily.

Sasuke suddenly had a violent coughing fit and was turning quite red while Sakura and Shikamaru looked shell shocked. "What the hell does Jiraiya teach you?" Shikamaru asked.

"Naruto…if you ever try that, I'll kill you!" Sakura snarled.

"It – it's just a joke," Naruto said, shielding himself with his arms.

"You could try a variation of that though, Sasuke-kun," Sakura said thoughtfully, "You should wait for her in her room shirtless and carry the bouquet of flowers – if she resists that then I don't know what'll work."

"The shirtless Uchiha, not a bad idea. It should work since even guys like Orochimaru want your body!" Naruto said ,laughing hysterically.

"While we're keeping her occupied we'll tell her good things about you so she'll have a nice outlook on you when she gets back to her room and you're there waiting!" Sakura said.

Sasuke was not at all comfortable with this idea, it did sound a little bit creepy and what in case she put a restraining order on him? Could you even do that in the ninja world? He was over thinking things again, but if he had to strip a little to win the girl then he would do it.

* * *

Kiba ran a brush through his hair and it got stuck. "Oi Shino! A little help here!" he shouted to his roommate. Shino tugged it out of his hair roughly making Kiba yell out in pain as a couple of strands parted with his scalp. Now his hair was looking even untidier than usual. Kiba sighed and tried to flatten it using his fingers. At least his hair was better than that duck-butt Uchiha's.

"How dare he?" Kiba asked out loud, "There's all the girls in the world that worship him and he chooses the one that _I _happen to lo – like!"

"I don't think you have anything to worry about. Why? Because Hinata doesn't have an interest in Sasuke," Shino said.

"Hmmm, but why were they having lunch together!"

"You know Hinata, she is too polite to decline anyone…"

"Yeah. That must be it. You know what, no more waiting and punking out, I am going to find her tonight and ask her to be my date for the masquerade ball!"

"Good luck with that," Shino said.

"What? Don't you believe I can do it?"

"..."

Kiba huffed and started rummaging through his things until, "Hah! There it is!" He was holding up a can of deodorant. He sprayed himself with more than necessary which caused Shino to choke. He swore some of his insects probably died in inside him after he inhaled that overpowering deodorant.

"Shino, do you have gel?" Kiba asked.

"…Yes," Shino said and went to get it for Kiba. He handed the container to Kiba and Kiba opened it and started smearing some into his hair. He flattened the sides and his fringe down.

"Does that look better?" he asked Shino.

"I must ask…what are you trying to achieve?"

"I'm trying to get Hinata to notice me!"

"Oh she'll notice alright…"

Someone was tapping at the door and Shino went to answer it before Kiba could figure out the sarcastic tone that he used in his previous statement.

"Oh Kiba!" Shino was nearly knocked over by a dark haired female.

"Hana? What are you doing here? Did mom send you?" Kiba asked, staring at his sister who was dressed in shorts and t-shirt and she wore her hair down.

"No, Tsunade-sama gave us invitations to come to the resort. What's up with your hair?"

Kiba blushed and put his hands over his head while Hana turned to Shino, "Who is she?"

"Hinata Hyuga," Shino told her.

"Ah! I like her better than that Yamanaka girl he used to date," Hana said, "So it looks like you need some help little bro, first, go and wash that crap out of your hair!"

* * *

"I expected all of you to take this seriously but it seems I was mistaken…" Pein said, facing all his members. They were using his room at the resort as their current meeting room. Pein was holding all of their forms in his hand that he had asked them to fill about their partners.

He pulled one form out from the pile, "Tobi, to the question 'what do you think are your partner's greatest strengths' you responded that 'he was the most beautiful Senpai that you could ever hope for'."

Deidara turned to Tobi and gave him a dirty look, but Tobi nodded as though he was proud of what he had written.

"Hidan, I couldn't even read yours…with all the swearing and Kakuzu I didn't ask for a rundown of Hidan's annual expenditure."

"I had to order that ten-pack of Jashin's spankies!" Hidan defended himself.

Pein ignored that and pulled out another form, "Kisame, it is no way acceptable to use Itachi as your wingman in your attempts to get women. Itachi, how can you cast genjutsu on women and make them do things with Kisame? That is absolutely appalling behaviour!"

Kisame looked sheepishly at Itachi.

"Sasori and Deidara, I don't know whether I should be horrified or proud that you have thought of so many ways that you would like to kill each other!" Pein tossed the forms aside and clenched his fists, Konan saw the danger and appeared behind him to massage his tense shoulders. Pein took a deep breath, "It seems that I was wrong about using this holiday to try and promote team work. Just…go. Go and do what you want. Enjoy the holiday because after this it's serious business!"

Deidara and Hidan whooped while Itachi had a small smile on his face, Kisame was grinning, Tobi was jumping up and down, Zetsu and Kakuzu didn't show any notable expressions of excitement and Sasori had already mysteriously disappeared.

"Go on and get out of here boys, Pein and I have some _work _to do," Konan said silkily.

Hidan whistled and strode out of the room followed by all the other members. Itachi turned to Kisame, "I think it's time I checked up on how my little brother is doing…"

* * *

Hinata was nearly thrown off balance when someone slung their arm around her and shouted into her ear, "Heya Hinata!"

"N-Naruto-kun?" Hinata stammered, feeling the blood run out of her head and into her face.

While Hinata was distracted by Naruto, Shikamaru covertly stole the room card from her pocket and disappeared to give it to Sasuke. "Hinata-chan! How are you doing?" Sakura asked, bumping Karin who had been walking with Hinata, out of the way.

"I-I'm good, Sakura-san, how are you?"

"Fantastic, what say we go and have some ice cream and talk?" Sakura asked cheerily.

"Okay," Hinata said, still red and feeling light-headed because Naruto's arm was around her.

"Hey, where is Sasuke?" Karin asked. Sakura turned around and looked at her up and down and then gave her a bright smile, "Karin was it?" Sakura asked her.

"That's right, who are you?"

"I'm Sakura and this here is my boyfriend, Naruto. We're Sasuke's best friends. He's told us so much about you," Sakura told Karin.

"Really?" Karin asked excitedly and Sakura nodded, still with a fake smile plastered on her face.

"Yup. He is going to the shared bathing hot spring so you'd better hurry up and get there," Sakura told her. This wasn't true as Sasuke was currently preparing to go to Hinata's room and the only guys that were in the hot spring were Chouji and Lee.

"Eeeeh! Thank you for telling me!" Karin squealed, pulling Sakura into a hug and then running off at the speed of light to the hot spring. On the other side, Naruto was busy talking Hinata's ear off and the girl just smiled and nodded at all his comments. Once they had sat down and ordered their ice cream at the parlour, Naruto and Sakura decided that it was time to get down to business.

"Hinata-chan…has any guy caught your eye yet?" Sakura asked, winking at her.

"W-what?"

"Come on, there must be a guy you like! Everyone's hooking up, Naruto and I, then there's Neji and Tenten, Shikamaru and Temari," Sakura told her, then she couldn't help adding, "And Kiba likes Ino. You don't want to be left out do you? The masquerade ball is coming up soon and you're going to need a date."

Hinata was eating a big scoop of ice cream so she couldn't answer.

"I think we're going about this the wrong way Sakura-chan, let me try," Naruto whispered. Sakura was slightly worried at what Naruto would try to pull.

"Hinata. Can I propose a hypothetical situation to you?" Naruto asked.

"Um…okay, Naruto-kun," Hinata was feeling very nervous at being surrounded her former crush and his girlfriend and wondered why Sakura was asking her such strange questions.

"Say, hypothetically, you wanted to buy a pair of Uchiha pants - "

"Uchiha pants?" Hinata asked.

Sakura was giving Naruto a look that said _Shut up! You'd better shut up right now!_ Naruto didn't notice and carried on speaking, "Right, so you wanted to buy a pair of Uchiha pants but there was a guy who came and bought all of the pants and only left one behind, would you buy that last one?"

Hinata looked at Naruto and blinked while Sakura was staring open-mouthed.

"I – I – what?" Hinata sputtered, still clueless.

* * *

Sasuke was relaxing on a couch in Hinata's room, waiting for her to arrive. He was still debating what he would do or say when she arrived. The roses were on the table and his shirt was still on. _Should I take it off before she comes in or when she comes in? _Sasuke wondered, _Do I need to do a pose or something? Nah, that would be retarded…I'll just do this…_ Sasuke picked up the roses, sat on the couch and stretched his one arm over the back of the couch while the other arm held the roses. _Yeah, I'll go with this one, _Sasuke thought, putting the roses down and he quickly pulled his shirt off. Hinata should be heading back to her room very soon.

He couldn't change his mind and leave the room because Shikamaru locked him in the room and took the card to return it to Hinata so she wouldn't get suspicious.

Sasuke was nervous as hell and he kept imagining various scenarios of what would happen after he asked Hinata to the masquerade party. Scenario one; she would blush beautifully and say yes, scenario two; she would decline him politely, scenario three; she would laugh hysterically and tell him to get the hell out of her room, scenario four; she would mercilessly beat him up.

He got into position as he heard the click of the card in the door. _Keep cool, just keep cool…_

The door opened.

Sasuke froze.

"Kyaaaaaaah!" Karin held her hands over her heart and ran towards him.

Sasuke jumped over the couch faster than the eye could see. Karin jumped over after him and landed on top of him. Sasuke felt the wind get knocked out of him.

"Did I spoil the surprise?" Karin asked huskily.

_No, _Sasuke thought, _I am very surprised._

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked rudely.

"I'm sorry Sasuke, I didn't know you were planning this…I just came back to the room because I wanted to change out of my undies and put on my sexy ones to meet you at the hot springs…" Karin said, giggling. Sasuke groaned, he did NOT want to know that!

"Why would I meet you at the hot springs?" Sasuke asked as he tried to pry Karin's hands off his chest.

"Your friend Sakura told me that you were there waiting for me," Karin said.

_She must have tried to keep her out of the way but damn Sakura! Your plan backfired badly this time! _Sasuke thought as he pushed Karin off him and ran around the couch. Karin wasn't about to give up as she chased him around the couch. Sasuke made a dash for the door but Karin got there first and she locked it and tucked the card into the top of her shirt.

"You're so playful," Karin said, "Now if you want to get out of here you going to need this card…" She unbuttoned the top of her shirt and winked at him.

_GOD! I feel like running a chidori current through her heart right now! _Sasuke thought, clenching his fists.

"Give…me…the…card…now," Sasuke said slowly, trying to keep his killing instinct under control.

"Aww, why do you wanna leave when I just got here?" Karin asked with a pout.

"I want to leave because you're here!" Sasuke yelled.

"I have something for you…" Karin said, reaching into her shirt. For one happy moment, Sasuke thought she was going to give him the card, but she pulled out a piece of paper.

"I've written this especially for you…I call it 'Ode to Sasuke' and it's an expression of how and what I feel for you."

"I don't want to hear it."

"Oh come on, you know you want to," Karin said, backing him up against the wall.

_Must…not…kill…must…not…kill…must…not…kill…must…not…kill_

Karin began to recite her 'Ode to Sasuke', "Look into my thighs, you will see, what you do to me…"

_Must…kill…must…kill…must…kill…must…kill…must…kill…must…kill_

"Search your heart – search your soul and when you find me there you'll search no more…"

"Stop it. Shut up. I mean it."

"Don't tell me you don't want to. You can't tell me you don't want this now."

"I don't! Don't touch me!"

"You know it's true, Oh Sasuke! I just wanna do. I want to do you!"

Sasuke was close to puking now.

"Look into your heart – you will find, there's nothing there to hide. Take me now – take me on the floor! I want to give it to you – I would sacrifice!"

Sasuke felt weak with disgust and in one push that he wasn't expecting, he found himself on the floor and Karin was kneeling over him. It was crazy but he saw his life flash before his eyes.

"There's no body, like your body. And no other – could give it to me harder. I'd drop my underwear whenever you're near. All the time – I wanna go all the way! You know it's true! Oh Sasuke! I just wanna do, I want to do you!"

Somewhere in the distance, Sasuke heard the door open slowly and his spirits lifted – he was going to be rescued! Both he and Karin turned their heads to the door where Hinata stood looking shocked.

"U-um, I'm s-sorry. I didn't know y-you were busy, Karin-chan and Sasuke-kun…I-I I'll come back later!" Hinata said, and she pulled the door and left.

Taking advantage of Karin being distracted, Sasuke managed to get up, "Hinata, wait!"

He grabbed the roses and his shirt and ran for the door before Karin could get him, luckily Hinata didn't lock the door. He ran in case Karin decided to follow him. Sasuke looked around for Hinata but he couldn't see her anywhere. She had probably thought that he and Karin were about to do God knows what and now he had pretty much blew his chances with her.

"Dammit!" Sasuke threw the roses down and kicked them away, "Now Hinata definitely will not want me." He hung his head sombrely not noticing the pair of red eyes that were watching him from a dark corner.

"Foolish little brother, looks like you're going to need my help on this one," Itachi said softly, as he watched his brother mope around.

* * *

**Sasuke fails again!**

**Will Itachi really be able to help him from the shadows where Sakura and Naruto have failed?**

**Or will Hana beat him to it by helping Kiba?**

**Next Chapter: Hinata's Bad Day.**

**So as you've probably guessed, 'Ode to Sasuke' was a parody of Everything I do 'I do it for you) by Bryan Adams. Hope I didn't totally ruin the song for any fans of it!**

**It was actually much dirtier than this but I had to tone it down for the story.**

**The naked man idea is from 'How I met your mother'**

**If you enjoyed, please, please review!**


	10. Hinata's Bad Day

**A/N: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! You are all awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto…**

**Chapter 10 – Hinata's Bad Day**

* * *

_Beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep –_

_Crash!_

Itachi Uchiha rose from his slumber with his arm still in the throwing position, he looked over at his alarm clock which was impaled with a kunai. _Hmm that's the 255__th__ one, need to stop doing that, _Itachi thought, stretching his lean muscular body. He threw aside the plain white covers and stood up to go about his daily exercise routine which consisted of 400 push ups, 400 sit ups and 50 laps around the area.

When he got back to their room, Kisame was still sound asleep, half hanging off the bed and his one arm was draped on the ground. Itachi shook his head and went to brush his teeth, shower and get dressed. In one quick motion, he tied up his long hair into a ponytail and then he reached into his drawer and pulled out a square of what looked like paper, smiled at it and tucked it back.

He picked up a folder that was lying on the little table in the middle of the room. _Time to put my plan into action,_ Itachi thought with a smug smile as he left the room to meet Konan, Hidan and Deidara whom he had instructed to meet him in the little tea shop.

"What do you want with us, un?" Deidara asked, his visible eye was looking a bit red and puffy. Hidan was looking deep in thought, which was very unusual.

"I want to help my little brother with his little problem," Itachi said, laying the folder down and opening it to reveal two cards and a newspaper.

"What's his problem?" Deidara asked.

"There's a girl with whom he is having trouble," Itachi said.

"Is she bullying him?"

"…No. He is having trouble winning over her affections."

"No…way…I just can't imagine you or your brother ever having trouble with charming women," Konan said.

"Well there are some women that are immune to even us Uchiha," Itachi continued, "But I have a plans that are sure to work."

Deidara scoffed, "Why are we helping your brother anyway, they are our enemy! Hello!"

"Deidara, you do not see the bigger picture. If we can distract them all with love then it will make things easier for us in the long run," Itachi said.

Deidara frowned but didn't comment. Konan nodded, as if agreeing with Itachi's scheme.

"Hidan? Your thoughts?"

"Huh? Wha?" Hidan asked, finally joining them back in the ninja world, "I mean yeah…fuck yeah! Let's do that shit!"

Itachi, Deidara and Konan surveyed Hidan with their eyebrows raised while he grinned broadly at them to cover up his daydreaming. Itachi disregarded this and went on to explain his plan to them, "Konan, you deliver this to Hinata Hyuuga, and make sure that red-haired harpie doesn't get her hands on it. I've been watching her…and she's the reason half of his attempts aren't working."

Konan took the card from him, "It says to sit at this table."

Itachi nodded and handed another card to Deidara who snatched it roughly out of his grip.

"Give that one to Sasuke," Itachi instructed.

"This isn't even the same table as the girl, un."

"I know. Now Hidan…Hidan? HIDAN?"

"What! I was listening…" Hidan said. Itachi frowned, Hidan's mind was elsewhere and he needed full cooperation if this mission was to succeed.

"You have to give this to her while she is sitting here," Itachi said, handing Hidan a newspaper.

"What's this shit for?"

"Well, assuming she reads her horoscope, which I took the liberty of writing myself, by the way of the seating arrangements, it will put the idea in her head that Sasuke is her true love…"

Konan, Deidara and Hidan stared at Itachi for a while before they burst into laughter. Itachi looked mildly annoyed. How dare they laugh at his well thought out plan?

"Sorry Itachi, but this plan is rather elaborate and clichéd," Konan said with an apologetic look on her face.

Itachi was about to argue but someone caught his eye. That someone was Hana Inuzuka with her little brother in tow and Hinata Hyuuga. Konan, Deidara and Hidan looked in the direction that Itachi was staring in. Hidan narrowed his eyes, "Hey! Isn't that the girl from the pic – I mean party – that party in Konoha," Hidan said, nearly letting slip that he had been going through Itachi's drawers.

Itachi nodded and woke up, grabbing a hat off the head of an old man. He put it on and stalked towards Hana's table. "What is he up to, un?" Deidara asked, watching Itachi stealthily hide behind a large fern.

"All he's missing is a stick-on handlebar moustache," Konan laughed.

Meanwhile, Itachi was straining his ears to hear Hana's conversation.

"Kiba, wasn't there something you wanted to ask Hinata?" Hana asked sweetly.

_Oh no, oh no no no no. If this little punk gets to her first then it'll ruin everything! Sorry Hana-chan, but it seems we're enemies this time._

Hana carried on coaxing Kiba, unaware of her newfound enemy. Kiba turned slightly red and looked a bit sick. Hinata took a sip of her tea and then looked around herself, feeling like somebody was watching her. Her attention snapped back to what Kiba was saying when he uttered her name.

"Yes Kiba-kun?"

"Well…I was wondering if-"

_Oh no you don't, _Itachi thought, striding out from behind the fern. He walked passed their table and bumped Kiba roughly as he was going passed. Kiba lurched forward and dropped his cup of tea which spilled onto Hinata as she was sitting opposite him. Hana quickly grabbed a napkin and started to wipe Hinata's shirt. "Kiba, you're so clumsy!"

"It wasn't my fault! That guy with the hat bumped me!"

"What guy with the hat?"

Surely enough, Itachi had already ducked out of sight again.

"I –it's okay. Let me just go back to my room and change my shirt," Hinata said, holding it away from her body and waking up and walking away looking embarrassed. Kiba hung his head in shame while Hana looked at him reproachfully. Itachi smirked at a job well done and went back to his table. "Wow, you are serious about this," Konan said.

"Well? What are you waiting for? Go and deliver those cards."

* * *

Sasuke was still lying in his bed with a pillow over his head, trying to drown out Naruto's irritating voice. The idiot was going from one topic to another without even a pause for breath. Mostly he was talking about Sakura; Sakura's eyes, Sakura's hair, Sakura's smile. Sasuke found himself thinking about the dark haired girl, with the pale eyes and the cutest smile. He found himself smiling too from beneath the pillow, but that smile quickly turned in to a frown when he remembered how he screwed up his chances with Hinata.

"Hey Sasuke, wake your lazy ass up. We have work to do!" Naruto said, throwing his wet towel at Sasuke. Sasuke growled and leapt up from the bed, he wound the towel around his arm and lashed it at Naruto. "Ow! What is wrong with you?" Naruto cried. He hit Sasuke over the head with a hairbrush.

Sasuke lashed out at him again with the towel, hitting his ass. Naruto clutched it in pain and dodged another blow from Sasuke. The two boys didn't notice that Neji was standing at the door looking dumbstruck. Neji cleared his throat, "Sorry to interrupt your uh…kinky foreplay or whatever it is that I just walked in on…but there's someone outside looking for Sasuke."

"No this wasn't-" Naruto started to defend his case but Sasuke interrupted.

"Is it a red-haired chick with glasses?"

"Uh…no. Blonde," Neji said, looking irritated. He walked out and slammed the door behind him. Sasuke pulled a t-shirt on and went outside, there was no one in sight.

"Damn that Hyuuga. Didn't think he was one for pranks," Sasuke mumbled. As he was about to go back inside, he saw, what he thought was a blonde woman approach him.

"No!" Sasuke cried, seeing the look on her face, "I will not give you my autograph, a photograph, my shirt, a kiss or my virginity! Just leave me the hell alone and go away! I hate you fangirls!"

The blonde woman stopped short and looked at him quizzically with the uncovered blue eye, "I'm no fangirl," the blonde said in a very masculine voice, "But here, I was told to give this to you, un."

Sasuke took it reluctantly while eyeing the blonde suspiciously. While he was reading the card, Deidara disappeared out of sight. "Come to table 15 at the tea house if you want a shot at getting what you so desire," Sasuke read. There was no way he was going to any tea house, what if it was Karin trying to lure him there? Then again, Karin was rather lewd and tactless so he doubted it. While contemplating whether he should go or not, Naruto burst out of the door and grabbed the card. "Whooo! Let's go, maybe it's from Hinata!"

Sasuke doubted that, but he was curious to know who sent this, and if it was Karin…well he was used to running from her scary wiles.

* * *

Hinata changed out of her ruined, tea-stained shirt and walked to the little kitchen to eat the leftover lasagne from yesterday. She was feeling rather starved but the lasagne was nowhere in sight. "Hey Hina, what you looking for?" Karin asked, appearing in the kitchen wearing only her white towel.

"Just the lasagne I had left over from last night, I'm starving," Hinata said.

"Oh sorry, I was feeling hungry so I ate it for breakfast. Oops," Karin said.

Hinata groaned inwardly and her stomach groaned along too. "It's okay…I'll just go get something…" When she was outside, Hinata sighed loudly and trudged towards one of the café's. "Hey there! Hinata is it?" a voice yelled.

Hinata looked ahead at a blue-haired woman who was waving at her.

"H-hello," Hinata said.

"I have something for you," the woman said, giving her a card.

"Who is this f-from?"

"Ooh, I'm not supposed to tell," the woman said with a wink, "Just be there ok?"

Hinata nodded, still feeling confused, but she couldn't ponder about it for much longer because someone suddenly grabbed her arm. "K-Kurenai-sensei!"

"Oh Hinata, thank God I found you. Please can you get me some bottled water, I absolutely refuse to drink water from the tap! It might have chemicals that are bad for the baby!"

"O-okay! I'll get it right now," Hinata said, smiling weakly, her stomach growling louder.

"Quickly! I'm thirsty and I can't walk far with these swollen feet so I'm going back to my room, you can bring it there!"

Kurenai left and Hinata frowned slightly. _I'll just get Kurenai-sensei's water quickly then come back to get something to eat, then I'll go to the tea shop, _Hinata thought, hurrying to one of the shops. She bought the water and went to Kurenai's room. "Here you go Kurenai-sensei."

Kurenai looked at the bottle and began to cry loudly, she threw the bottle at Hinata who narrowly dodged it. "It's flavoured!" Kurenai cried, "I wanted plain water. THE BABY wanted plain water! Don't you care about this baby at all?"

Hinata's eyes were wide with fright, "I-I'll get another." She ran back to the shop and made sure she got a plain bottle of water. She bought two for extra measure. When she got back, Kurenai was sobbing softly. Hinata handed her the water tentatively.

"I'm so sorry Hinata, it's just…it's these hormones and Asuma…oh you wouldn't believe it! I'm sure you don't want to sit here and listen to me whine," Kurenai said miserably.

"Y-you can t-talk to me, sensei," Hinata said, even though inside she was crying with hunger.

Kurenai sniffed, "I caught him watching porn! Can you believe it? I mean, am I not good enough anymore? Am I not sexy enough? Am I ugly because I'm pregnant? Tell me Hinata!"

"N-n-no! You're very beautiful Kurenai-sensei," Hinata assured her.

"Then why would he do that? I'm so disgusted! I mean, maybe I would be okay if he asked me to watch it with him like all those other times-"

Hinata gasped, she wasn't sure if all of this was supposed to be for her innocent ears.

"But he watches it with that no-good perv Kakashi! What am I going to do?" Kurenai cried.

Hinata sighed and put her arm around her sensei, this was going to be a long day…

* * *

"Why are you two following me?" Sasuke asked tiredly. Naruto and Sakura insisted on going with him to the tea shop. They were even wearing lame co-ordinated t-shirts. Naruto's read: I'm special with a giant red heart and Sakura's read: I'm with special, also with a giant red heart. "We want to see who it is!" Sakura said, her green eyes sparkling with excitement.

_Knowing my luck, it's bound to be some fangirl stalker, _Sasuke thought. His multiple unfortunate encounters with Karin had put him on edge. He walked into the shop and scanned the area – no suspicious people around, there were mostly elderly couples and a silver haired guy who was sitting with another guy who had a newspaper in front of him, covering his face. Sasuke found table 15 and sat down while Sakura and Naruto went off to find a table for themselves.

The bell above the door of the tea shop tinkled as someone opened the door, Sasuke turned his head to look and saw Hinata walk in. She looked around nervously and her eyes landed on Naruto and Sakura. Sasuke noticed her wistful look and frowned, but his heart sped up as she turned and looked at him and smiled slightly. "Hinata! How are you?" Naruto shouted and waved.

_Retard, _Sasuke thought.

"Hello!" Hinata greeted them and she walked towards Sasuke. _So it was her! _Sasuke thought, and he suddenly felt like he was being suffocated, like the air was being sucked out of him as he stared at her approaching him. He found himself wracking his brains for something witty and awesome to say but nothing was coming to mind. He opened his mouth to start with a simple greeting but Hinata walked right passed him and was headed for the table in front of his.

Sasuke turned and looked at Naruto and Sakura who looked just as confused as he felt. He then remembered something that Naruto had taught him and he woke up quickly and went to pull out her chair for her just as she was about to sit down. He had pulled it too far back and for a moment she found herself sitting in midair and then fell on her bottom. "Shit! Sorry!" Sasuke cursed, helping her up.

"I-it's okay," Hinata said, giving him a strained smile.

_Oh my God, she must think I'm one pathetic freak_, Sasuke fretted as his display of gentleman behaviour went horribly wrong.

"Are you meeting someone here?" he asked quickly, feeling quite awkward that he tried to pull that stunt when he probably was not even her date here.

"Yes," Hinata replied softly.

"Oh…okay…" Sasuke said, and disappointedly trudged back to his table, wondering who on earth sent him the card.

* * *

Hinata sat down properly, feeling embarrassed after what happened with Sasuke. Lately, he seemed to always be there when something strange was happening. Her stomach was still growling in agony but she had to come straight here because the card said 2pm. She figured she would just get something to eat here. "C-can I please have a menu?" Hinata asked a waiter who was passing by. She hoped it wasn't rude to order before the person she was supposed to meet arrived. He handed her a menu and she scanned it quickly, "Tea please, and a slice of cheesecake."

The waiter left and Hinata found her attention wandering to Naruto and Sakura; they were laughing and holding hands over the table. Hinata smiled, she was glad that her friends had found happiness. Then she looked over at Sasuke who was sitting alone and looking like his usual grumpy self, she actually felt sorry for him, it must get really uncomfortable when your two best friends were dating one another. Sasuke looked at her and caught her staring at him, she blushed and decided to try and make conversation. "Hi Sasuke-kun."

"…Hi," he said, sounding a bit unsure.

"Are you waiting for Karin-chan?" she asked.

Sasuke's eyes widened and for a moment, she thought she saw a look of pure horror and panic come over his face. "I'm s-sorry for asking," she said quickly.

"I can't stand that girl," Sasuke said in a low voice that she found very scary.

"B-but yesterday you were-"

"_She _came on to _me._ If you didn't come when you did…I shudder to think what she would have done…"

"Oh…w-well she is pushy I guess…But she really likes you," Hinata offered.

"Hn. Well she better not come anywhere near me again, or I swear I'll…I'll…"

Hinata was distracted by the arrival of a silver haired man who slid into the seat opposite her.

"Hey there," he said with a wink.

"H-hello," Hinata said, "Did you s-send me this c-card?"

"What? Hahahaha, no," the guy chuckled, "I'm here to give you this." He slapped a newspaper down in front of her, "Read your horoscope." He winked at her again and grinned widely, making her slightly uneasy.

"I-I'll do that…"

The man didn't leave, "What you fucking waiting for? Open up and read!"

Taken aback at his language, Hinata flipped over to the horoscope section and looked for Capricorn. "Enjoy!" he woke up abruptly and clashed with the waiter carrying Hinata's order. It crashed to the floor; the teacup skidded across the floor, spilling its contents everywhere while the cheesecake lay splattered on the floor.

_Look up, your true love sits right before you. Today is the day, don't let him get away. _Hinata looked up and saw the waiter looking down at her with an apologetic expression on his face.

_The waiter? _Hinata looked at him, he seemed to be in his mid-twenties, with big curly hair and slightly plump. _Horoscopes are nothing but nonsense, _Hinata decided.

"Miss…sorry about your order. I'll go back and get another…" he told her.

Hinata bent down at looked at the mess on the floor and sighed. She was beyond hungry now. She was so hungry that she no longer felt like eating. "Don't bother," Hinata said, waking up and heading for the door.

* * *

Sasuke had already left the tea shop when he saw that creepy silver haired guy sit at Hinata's table. Whoever left him that card could go to hell because it sure wasn't Hinata. His mood worsened when he saw Naruto and Sakura come towards him. _Why do they keep following me? Don't they have some making out to do or something? _Sasuke wondered in annoyance.

"What happened? Why didn't you sit with Hinata?" Naruto shouted.

"I was told to sit at table 15," Sasuke said through gritted teeth.

"Maybe she made a mistake with the numbers?" Sakura offered.

"Then why would she sit at a different table when she saw me sitting there _and _ she told me she was meeting someone when I asked her."

"Good point."

"Well I wonder who sent the card then?"

"Some good for nothing loser with no life…"

"Aww Sasuke! You're angry because when Hinata walked through that door you thought she was coming for you! Ahahahahaha! And instead of pulling out her seat, you dropped her hahahaha!" Naruto laughed hysterically.

Sakura smacked his arm, "Look! There's Hinata coming this way!"

Sasuke looked, and sure enough, Hinata was walking in their direction with her head hung.

"She seems disappointed," Sakura said.

"Ask her to the masquerade party!" Naruto yelled.

"She probably already heard now!" Sasuke snarled.

"No, she looks like she's in her own world, go for it Sasuke-kun!" Sakura said.

"No, I'd rather not-"

"Just go!" Naruto said, giving him a shove as Hinata came near them. Sasuke lost his footing and crashed right into her and would have knocked her over if he didn't act quickly and grab her to steady her.

She shook him off her and looked at him with irritation written all over her face. She raised her hand and smacked him upside the head. "Watch w-where you're going, you – you – you clumsy idiot!"

All Sasuke could do was stare in shock as she walked away.

"Wow. She…she's pretty amazing…" he whispered.

* * *

Hinata marched angrily until she realised that she had just hit Sasuke Uchiha. The Sasuke Uchiha. Genius, rookie of the year, Sasuke Uchiha. _What was I thinking? I have to go apologise, _Hinata thought frantically, she turned and walked back, seeing that he was still standing where he had bumped into her.

"S-S-Sasuke-kun, I'm so sorry…I didn't mean to h-hit you. I was having a bad day and-"

Sasuke cut her off, "Hinata," he said barely above a whisper.

Hinata braced herself, he was probably going to yell at her…or worse, challenge her to a fight. "Hinata, would you go to the masquerade party with me?"

"P-please…I don't want to fight y-you."

"Huh?"

"Oh – oh! You want to g-go to the masquerade ball with m-me?" Hinata asked again, not sure if she had heard correctly the first time.

"Yes."

Hinata looked at him in confusion. _He wants to go…with me…that's unexpected…_

"Well?" Sasuke prompted.

"A-are you sure?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't…"

"Oh…okay then…" She had been his date for the Konoha Shinobi party, but that they had been forced into, now here he was asking her on his own free will.

"Is that a yes?"

"Y-yes." Hinata looked up at Sasuke and smiled. _Maybe he isn't that scary or bad after all…_

* * *

**FINALLY!**

**Itachi's plan kind of worked…in an indirect way!**

**Kiba and Hana lost out!**

**How will Karin react to this?**

**Next time: Masquerade Madness!**

**A/N: Wow, took me ages to write this. Writers block sucks! But I hope this chapter didn't…**

**Please review!**


	11. Masquerade Madness

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews! They make me smile **

**I would like to thank my awesome friend Sandy for the help and inspiration for this chapter!**

* * *

**Chapter 11 -Masquerade Madness!**

"How could she? I'm her friend! And she chose _him?_ That grumpy, stuck up fu-"

"That is your own fault, Kiba. You did not ask her. Sasuke asked. You ask and you get. Don't ask, don't get anything."

"Shut up Shino!"

"…You shut up." Shino said in a low voice.

"What did you say to me?"

"You shut up…"

"Boys, boys, boys…don't fight. I have this all under control," Hana said with a devious smile on her face as she combed her hair and tied her masquerade mask. She was wearing a red and black dress, which was strapless. The top had a corset detail and the bottom was knee length and flared out.

Kiba and Shino were dressed in plain tuxedo's, Shino didn't have a mask on as he opted for just wearing his shades while Kiba had a plain black mask.

"What's your plan?" Kiba asked.

"Don't worry lil bro, you'll see…" Hana said, flipping her hair back, "All I'm going to tell you is, Sasuke won't be around Hinata much tonight so you better make your move…"

* * *

Hinata had just finish explain to Karin that Sasuke had asked her to the masquerade ball. She hoped Karin wouldn't take the news too badly. She looked at the girl who was wearing a tiny, cherry, tight dress that ended mid-thigh. Hinata's was more conservative, it was an off-white dress with tiny cap sleeves, a low neckline, it was fitted and flowed out from beneath her waist to reach her knees. It was accented with a black ribbon tied into a bow around the waist. She was wearing a lacy black mask.

Karin looked thoughtful instead of angry, "I get it."

"Y-you do?" Hinata asked.

"Yes! Sasuke is taking you to the dance to make me jealous! He is still trying to play hard to get."

Hinata frowned. She doubted that was why Sasuke had asked her. But then again…why did he ask her? It was strange…

But before Hinata could ponder the situation any further, there was an urgent knocking on the door and when Hinata went to answer it, Ino burst in looking stressed out. Her long blonde hair was swept up in an elegant bun with a few strands hanging loose. She was wearing a short gold dress that hugged her curves. She was holding a matching jewelled mask in her hand.

"Oh my word. You look so beautiful Hinata!" Ino gushed.

"So do you!" Hinata said, smiling.

Karin was ignored.

"Hinata, do you know if Kiba has a date for the party?"

"U-um…I thought he was going with you," Hinata said, confused, because Sakura had told her that Kiba liked Ino, and she remembered that they were dating at one point.

"No…well he didn't ask me," Ino said, looking anxious, "Wait, who are you going with, Hinata?"

"S-S-Sasuke-kun," Hinata said, feeling her face heat up.

"You lucky little devil," Ino said, winking at Hinata.

"Actually, he is going with her to make me jealous," Karin interjected. Ino turned and looked at her, raising an eyebrow, "Somehow…I doubt that."

"Oh, I'll have him in my arms by the end of the night, you'll see…" Karin said smugly.

Ino rolled her eyes and gave Hinata the 'that bitch is trippin'' look. But a shadow of doubt about Sasuke was slowly being cast over Hinata's mind.

"So…what should I do?" Ino asked, biting her bottom lip.

"Maybe he was too shy to ask you," Hinata said, giving her friend a warm smile, "Meet up with him at the party…"

Ino looked less tense as the girls made their way to the building where the party was happening.

* * *

Itachi stood against the wall, watching the people at the party interact with one another. He witnessed men openly eyeballing women's rear ends, women complimenting other women on how beautiful they looked when they clearly didn't mean it, little kids running around causing havoc and he saw one of the waiters sneeze into a platter of pastries. Itachi made a mental note not to eat anything at this party.

He looked over at the Konoha ninja; the Yamanaka girl was latched on to the Inuzuka's arm. _Good, she can keep the dog boy busy and out of the way. _Shikamaru and Temari were lazily swaying to the beat of the music, Kakashi was reading that book of his, Neji and Tenten were also dancing, and so were Naruto and Sakura. Choji was sitting and eating, Lee was breakdancing to a slow song while Gai and few other people were around him cheering, Shino was looking very bored, Gaara and Matsuri were sitting down and having a chat, Kankuro was busy hitting on a girl in a deep purple dress and matching mask and Asuma was massaging Kurenai's feet.

Ah, and there was his little brother, standing stiffly with Hinata by his side. _Oh Sasuke, there is much you need to learn if you wish to court this lovely maiden, _Itachi thought poetically. Shaking his head disdainfully, Itachi turned around and decided to have a drink when he noticed something odd.

A young woman was emptying a sachet of white powder into a glass of soda. Upon closer inspection, Itachi noticed that it was Shinji's Laxative Powder. He'd know it anywhere because he had to buy a whole carton once when Kisame was constipated.

Itachi's eyes travelled up to the girl; red mask, ivory skin, ruby red lips and luxurious brunette locks, it could only be the girl of his dreams, Hana Inuzuka. He saw her smirk, pick the glass up and head towards his brother. "Evil angel," Itachi said, narrowing his eyes, "I can't let you get away with this."

He noticed that Karin was also sashaying her way across the dancefloor, to get to Sasuke no doubt. "Not on my watch," Itachi said, performing some seals.

"ITACHI YOU BASTARD! TASTE THIS SHIT!" Hidan danced into Itachi's way.

Itachi cringed as the jutsu hit Hidan instead of himself. A dreamy expression came over Hidan's face and then he returned to normal. "So, want some?"

"No." Itachi said, interested to see how this night would play out.

* * *

Sasuke felt a weird sensation come over his body and then quickly disappear. He frowned and then glanced at Hinata out of the corner of his eye; she was looking amazing, she was looking…dare he think it…gorgeous. She was smiling as she watched Lee crumping on the dancefloor. Sasuke felt his throat constrict and his palms get sweaty, what was this feeling? He wanted to touch her silky hair, run his fingers through it, he wanted to hold her hand and kiss her rosy lips. He shook his head, _time to stop acting like a noob. I'm the most bad-ass guy here. _He wanted to tell her something that would blow her away, make her swoon or jump into his arms. _I am Sasuke Uchiha, the ladies love me. _

"Hinata," Sasuke said, his voice coming out husky.

She turned to him with a slight blush on her face.

_Dammit I am good, _Sasuke thought, smirking at her.

She smiled back and that was when his mind went blank.

"Um…oh," he started. _What was I going to say? Just one smile and I lose my mind? This is troublesome…uh oh, now I sound like Shikamaru._

"So… your dress…it um, fits you well."

"Thank you," Hinata said softly, "You look-"

"Hinata!" Suigetsu suddenly appeared, grasping her hand in his. Sasuke got pushed aside roughly. He was about to give Suigetsu a piece of his mind but he saw two women approaching him from opposite directions. One was Kiba's sister and the other, the bane of his existence, Karin.

"S-S-Suigetsu, was it?"

"You remembered me! But Hinata – your dress!"

"W-What's wrong with it?"

"It looks like someone spilled gorgeous all over it!"

Hinata laughed while Sasuke rolled his eyes and then remembered that he was supposed to be thinking of an escape route. Both women stopped on either side of him, with glazed looks on their faces. Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"I could have sworn…oh nevermind," Hana said, turning away.

Karin blinked a couple of times at him, frowned, and then left without a word, dragging Suigetsu and Jugo along.

Sasuke was left alone with Hinata again, feeling unsure of what to do. He tried to catch Naruto's eye but the fool was chatting Sakura's ear off. Naruto must have felt Sasuke's deadly glare on him because he looked Sasuke's way and gave him a big grin.

Sasuke cocked his head towards Hinata and hoped that Naruto caught his drift. Naruto nodded and then held out his arm and in a slow motion demonstration for Sasuke, he put it around Sakura's waist. Sasuke watched as Sakura giggled and kissed Naruto on the cheek.

_Hmm, it's worth a shot, _Sasuke thought, preparing to put his hand around Hinata's waist.

At that moment that he decided to do that, Hinata dropped her serviette and bent slightly to pick it up. To Sasuke's horror, he found that he had placed his hand on her bottom. Sasuke felt his face heat up and quickly removed his hand. Hinata straightened up with her face a fiery shade of red. Naruto was laughing his head off and he gave Sasuke a thumbs up.

Sasuke took a deep breath, "Sorry about that…wasn't my intention."

"It's okay," Hinata whispered.

The DJ began to play a slow, romantic tune and many couples made their way onto the dancefloor. He noticed Hinata looking wistfully at the couples. Sasuke cleared his throat, "Would you like to dance?"

"O-okay," Hinata said, with a small, unsure smile.

Sasuke took her hand and led her on to the dancefloor, deciding to mimic how Naruto was dancing with Sakura – but with more distance because Naruto and Sakura were practically making out on the dancefloor.

Sasuke's attention wandered to Asuma who attempting to dance with Kurenai in her pregnant condition.

Sasuke suddenly found himself imagining Hinata pregnant. She noticed that he was staring at her stomach with a weird look on his face and Sasuke mentally chidori'd himself for his errant thoughts.

"Are you hungry?" he asked harshly.

* * *

"Turn that shit off and play some real music!" Hidan roared, holding his drink up and stumbling.

"You're an embarrassment to the Akatsuki," Kakuzu commented.

"Oh yeah? Well you're a tight-ass money-whore!" Hidan slurred in Kakuzu's face.

"Ugh," Kakuzu said moving away from him.

Hidan was standing there, headbanging to his own tune when he was approached by a rather hot woman carrying a drink. "Sasuke, drink?"

_Huh, did she just call me Itachi's kid brother's name? Nah, must be imagining it!_

"Thanks!" Hidan grinned, taking the drink and downing it. He didn't notice the satisfied smirk on Hana's face as she turned and walked away. No sooner had she left, did Karin arrive. She was smiling flirtatiously at Hidan. _Fuck yeah! I'm popular with the chicks tonight._

Hidan winked at her. Karin squealed and grabbed his arm.

"Whoo, a feisty one, I like that."

"Oh Sasuke, I knew it! I knew you liked me!"

_The heck? She just call me Sasuke too? What the fuck? Oh well, either I'm damn drunk or they are just as fucking wasted. I'll use it to my advantage and get some action, hahahahaha! _Hidan thought deviously.

"How could I not like you? You're damn sexy!"

Karin had a lovestruck look in her eyes and Hidan felt proud of himself. Suddenly his stomach clenched and a great pain overwhelmed him. He heard his tummy grumble loudly.

"Dammit!" he clutched his stomach and ran quickly for the men's bathroom.

Unbeknownst to him, Karin followed closely behind and also ducked into the men's bathroom which thankfully, was empty. She sat in the stall next to Hidan's and looked down at the space between the separator of the two stalls. She giggled as she saw his pants as well as his Jashin spankies around his ankles.

"Sasuke…your underwear is so sexy…you're so sexy…oh my God you're sexy and you're hot!" Karin was saying just as Hidan dropped a motherload and grunted and cursed in pain.

"Everything about you is just so amazing, your shit even smells like roses!" Karin continued, oblivious to the noisy farts and plops going on in the stall next to her, "I love you Sasuke! I want to have your babies!"

Hidan finally finished his business and Karin came out of the stall and smiled adoringly at him.

"My babies huh? What say we go to my room and start practising?"

"Oh yes!" Karin said breathlessly.

As soon as they got to the room, Karin pushed him on to the bed and started kissing him roughly.

"Whoohoo! Score! Thank you Jashin-sama!" Hidan yelled as his clothes were practically being torn off him.

"I'm going to ravage you," Karin told him.

"Oh fuck yeah!"

Hidan was down to his spankies, but as Karin was about to reach for them, Hidan grabbed her hands, looked deeply into her eyes and whispered, "Hold on, no one but me touches the J-spanks. I'll take them off myself!"

Just as he was about to remove them, his stomach contracted painfully. "Motherfffffuuuu-!"

He jumped off the bed and made a run for the bathroom, "The J-spanks must not be stained! Don't go anywhere, I'll be back!"

Karin sighed contentedly, giggled, removed her dress and then posed sexily on the bed waiting for him to return.

* * *

Itachi was ecstatic that his genjutsu to trick Hana and Karin into believing Sasuke was Hidan and Hidan was Sasuke was a major success. Now Hidan was off somewhere having major diarrhoea, with Karin on his tail, and away from Sasuke and Hinata for the evening.

By the looks of things, his brother seemed to be doing fine so there was no cause for concern…yet.

"You seem so familiar," said a voice, jerking him out of his thoughts.

"So do you," Itachi said to Hana.

"Have we ever met?" she asked.

Itachi was glad his mask covered half his face, otherwise she surely would have known who he was.

"Perhaps. Would you like to dance?"

"I'd love to."

They went off to the dancefloor and she wrapped her arms around his neck while he held her waist.

"Your eyes, I know them," Hana said.

"Oh?"

"And your voice…that mouth…it's all very familiar to me."

"Hmm," Itachi said, prepared with another genjutsu just in case Hana recognised him, "You're a beautiful girl."

He smirked at the soft blush that appeared on her cheeks.

"Hehe, thank you. From what I can see, you're really handsome."

He stared deeply into her eyes and then something unexpected happened – she leaned up and kissed him tenderly on his lips. This surprised the normally unfazed Uchiha and threw him off balance so that the genjutsu he cast on her, Karin, Hidan and Sasuke was broken.

* * *

Hidan returned and he and Karin were continuing their furious make-out session. "Sasuke, you are the man of my – huh?" Karin looked at Hidan in front of her, "Who the hell are you?" She quickly grabbed her dress from the side of the bed and covered herself.

Hidan looked pissed off, "Bitch, you've been kissing me and wanting my ass for the past hour."

"You're not Sasuke! Where's my Sasuke?" Karin screamed, putting her dress back on hurriedly.

"It's been me all along," Hidan said tiredly, the sake effects wearing off.

"How could you!" Karin yelled, "You took advantage of me!"

"You came on to me!"

Karin pointed to the underwear that Hidan luckily still had on, "And those…those aren't Sasuke's undies?"

"Um no, they're custom made for me."

"So the ones I took off the line on the ship-"

"You fucking took those! Give them back you bitch!"

"Ugh, oh believe me I will. Gross!"

"Not gross when you were fucking sticking your tongue down my throat…"

"Gah!" Karin screamed and stormed off.

* * *

Sasuke found that he was actually having a great time with Hinata after all his little mishaps. He was actually smiling a little and she seemed to be comfortable in his presence, talking with a minimal amount of stuttering. He could actually have an intelligent conversation with her and that surprised him greatly and if it was even possible – he started to like her even more. Even the dog-boy asking her to dance multiple times and giving him dirty looks couldn't ruin his night now.

"Heeeeey Sasu-kaaaay!" Naruto called, coming over to their table, "Kakashi-sensei let me have sake! Lots of it!" His blue eyes were shining more brightly than usual.

"Great," Sasuke said sarcastically.

"Naruto-kun! Sakura-chan!" Hinata greeted.

"Hinata!" Naruto yelled, he pointed to Sasuke, "Isn't it great that Sasuke isn't gay anymore! He likes y-"

Sakura quickly covered his mouth and laughed uncomfortably, then punched his shoulder. Sasuke nearly choke on his food. Hinata looked confused and she turned to Sasuke.

"I'm not and I never was nor will I ever be…gay."

Hinata giggled softly and Sasuke felt a blush creep up his neck. He felt an overwhelming urge to kiss her. Hinata was now looking at him curiously, as if trying to figure something out and Sasuke found himself leaning in towards her with his heart pounding madly.

At that moment, Karin burst through the doors of the hall, screaming at Hidan who was right behind her. Hinata turned her head towards the commotion and Sasuke's heart, adrenalin and guts plummeted rapidly.

"I only want Sasuke, not you!" Karin yelled.

_Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! _Sasuke cursed, wanting to hide under the table.

"I don't want you either! I just want my fucking underwear back!"

There was a sea of sniggers around the hall. Sasuke just wanted to punch the crap out of the silver –haired guy and Karin, well, it was the second time he felt like running a chidori through her heart.

* * *

**Will Sasuke ever get to kiss the girl?**

**Will Karin ever give up?**

**Next chapter: Going in for the kill**

* * *

**Please Review!**

**Sorry this took so long... I apologise again if it isn't good. I hardly have time for writing fanfics anymore but I will keep updating my stories, though updates may be really slow...**

**But ! I have compiled this list of fanfics that you HAVE TO read...it would be a crime if you missed out on them...so here is my FanFiction Hotlist!**

**Fairy Tale ,WHO DID IT? And The Legacy of Itachi Uchiha by Inuyonas**

**Naruto: Ninja Burger Chronicles and The Shinobi Guide series by Kaori**

**The Mating Frenzy by MSkyDragons**

**My Unlucky Numbers by ryomaeijiarehot**

**It's For A Good Cause, I Swear by Sarah1281**

**Baby Geniuses by Amaranteotaku and Inuyonas**

**Crime Pays In Unexpected Ways and Hospital Grade Service by Amaranteotaku**

**ENJOY!**


	12. What Happened in the Dark

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, I really appreciate them!**

**Chapter 12 – What happened in the dark…**

Sasuke Uchiha was a brave man, there was no doubt about that. With a wide array of devastating techniques in his arsenal, enemies were no match for him. Throughout his ninja career, he had taken out a considerable amount of enemies. Despite all these outstanding talents, there was still one aspect that troubled him – women – more specifically, his fear of them. Oh sure, he seemed cold and aloof, distant and irritated as his hordes of fangirls approached him – but inside, he was screaming. What did they want from him? What was the need for them to get their paws all over him? To steal his clothing? Hadn't they ever heard of personal space? What was worse, and ever so disturbing, was that enemy kunoichi often flirted and tried to cop a feel while simultaneously trying to kill him.

Ever since Karin came into his life, his fear had escalated. However, there was comfort in knowing that _some _women were sane, and didn't think that he was a piece of meat and didn't continuously throw themselves at him. And this was probably why Sasuke found himself crouched slightly, trying to hide behind Hinata's tiny frame as Karin desperately looked across the hall trying to find him.

Hinata turned to see Sasuke crouched on the chair beside her. She had to stifle a laugh because the normally stoic boy had a look of anxiety on his face. Hinata then felt less tense knowing that he hadn't really asked her to the dance just to play hard to get for Karin because he really seemed to loathe Karin despite her delusions about him.

But wait. That would mean…that he had actually wanted to go with her. But why? Hinata was almost afraid to think about it.

Meanwhile, Sasuke was thinking about the kiss that almost happened, before Karin came along and ruined it, just as she had been ruining his every single moment with Hinata so far. The moment had been so ripe…so golden…and just like that, it was gone. Now Sasuke was faced with his second dilemma; how to reignite the moment?

An outlandish scenario came to mind, in which he boldly declares his feelings for her in front of the entire ballroom and then passionately kisses her. That might have worked in the lame movie he had gone to see with Naruto and Sakura, but he doubted that it would work here. Alternatively, he could just make small talk with her again, until an opening occurred. Or perhaps, he could ask her to go for a walk outside and then make his move.

He looked at her smiling face and then internally started gasping for breath while externally his face just went blank. A strange sound jerked him out of his stupor and he looked across the table to see that Naruto and Sakura were kissing. He saw Hinata glance at them and then put her head down shyly, a pink blush dusting her cheeks. Sasuke knew this was the moment, and he pictured himself cupping her chin and tilting her face upwards as his lips met hers. But as that thought crossed his mind, he began to feel overheated and sweaty. _What the – what is happening to me? I need air…_

When Naruto and Sakura broke away, Sasuke immediately grabbed Naruto, "Excuse me," he told Hinata stiffly, as he dragged Naruto along with him. Hinata and Sakura looked at each other.

"So…this party has been interesting," Sakura said, with an uncomfortable laugh as she tried to start up a chat with Hinata.

"What is your problem you bastard!" Naruto exclaimed as Sasuke pulled him towards the exit, carefully ducking and diving behind people and objects so that Karin wouldn't catch a whiff of him.

They were outside where several stalls were set up, decorated with fairy lights and streamers. Sasuke took a deep breath and faced Naruto who was scowling at him because he had separated him from his precious Sakura. Seriously, what happened to the 'bro's before ho's, brethren over wenches, mates before dates' honour code? Sasuke frowned, but decided not to get mad at Naruto, he needed his help, even though his help was unlikely to be very helpful.

"Okay. Okay," Sasuke muttered, "Nothing. Is. working. Out."

"You need to relax…unwind…have some sake," Naruto said, slinging an arm around his friend's shoulder.

"Sake…" Sasuke said thoughtfully.

"Lowers the inhi – inhab – uh…the what you call it-"

"Inhibitions!"

"That's what I said!"

"Anyway…I should try some…"

Desperate times called for desperate measures. Sasuke had never ingested alcohol a day in his life, but that was about to change, along with his 'never been kissed…by a girl' status.

"So…where can I get some of this sake?"

"We can go get some from the kitchen because I think Kakashi-sensei told them to hide all of it away," Naruto said, scratching his chin.

"Let's do this," Sasuke said with determination.

"Oooh! Oooh! Wait!" Naruto started yelling and pointing at something over Sasuke's shoulder. It was one of the stalls, but this one was more elaborately decorated with glowing neon hearts and pouting lips.

"What is it, dobe?"

"We should go get Sakura-chan and Hinata presents from there! They look like they're selling chocolates!"

"…Okay."

Sasuke walked a few paces behind Naruto who excitedly bounded over to the stall and immediately began examining everything in sight. Sasuke looked around more apprehensively, because on closer inspection, there was weird stuff displayed. Very weird stuff.

He walked over to the curly-haired, scrawny looking girl that appeared to be in charge of the stall. Sasuke had to clear his throat to get her attention and she looked up from her book which resembled the one that Kakashi always carried around. She licked her lips and smiled creepily, which made Sasuke think of Orochimaru. He quickly erased that thought from his head and asked, "What have you got that will be a great gift for a girl?"

"Oh boy have you come to the right place!" the girl squealed.

Sasuke stepped a few paces back because of her alarming nature and her overpowering perfume.

"Well, we've got excellent Body Chocolate!"

"What's that?" Sasuke asked, not liking the sound of it. In the corner of his eye, he saw Naruto pick up a strangely shaped lollipop and then immediately put it back down.

The girl was still smiling creepily, "Mmm, you're new to this. Well, it's a foreplay routine; she pours it on and you lick it off."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and the girl smiled even wider, "If you don't like that, I could offer you some edible underwear…"

Sasuke's eyes widened slightly and he yanked Naruto by the collar and pulled him away from the stall.

"So I'll put you down for the edible underwear!" the girl called.

"Time for that sake," Sasuke said breathlessly as he dragged Naruto along with him into the hall and towards the direction of the kitchen, all the while watching out for the red-haired menace.

"Hey, hey, HEY!" Naruto said, struggling in Sasuke's grip, "Easy on the tux – hey…isn't that…" His voice trailed off and blue eyes narrowed in the direction of the stage area and then he broke into a wide grin. Sasuke looked in the same direction and groaned.

"Oh…no…not him…"

"Now that Ero-sennin is here, this party is going to be aaaaawesome!" Naruto said in a sing-song voice.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "Did you forget what happened the last time he was anywhere near a party?"

Naruto didn't hear this because he was already whooping and cheering maniacally while people were staring at him in disdain.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is I – the great Jiraiya of the legendary sannin, esteemed writer –"

"Esteemed writer my ass," Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"Maybe if you read his books, you wouldn't be having so much trouble with Hinata," Kakashi said, suddenly appearing next to Sasuke. Sasuke first stared at him in shock and then quickly rearranged his features to look normal again.

"Hn."

Kakashi just winked and walked away while Sasuke scowled ferociously at his retreating back. He then walked calmly over to Naruto and punched him over the head.

"Yeeow!"

"Kitchen. Now."

"Geez, you don't have to be so violent all the time."

They snuck into the kitchen amidst cooks and waiters that were bustling around looking flustered and totally unaware that two guys had just entered the kitchen and were ducking and diving around the pots and pans looking for the sake stash.

* * *

"Now that I am here…LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!"

"Whooooo!"

"Ohhhh yeeeeah!"

"Icha Icha babay!"

"Have I got a surprise for all of you," Jiraiya said with a twinkle in his eye, "Everybody, make your way out on to the dance floor right now!"

"Uh oh…" Sakura murmured as she rose from her chair. Hinata looked more reluctant to stand up but after a few seconds she joined Sakura and they made their way to the dance floor.

"What do you think this is a-about?"

"Who knows," Sakura shrugged, "But knowing Jiriaya-sama, it can't be anything for our benefit and is probably for his amusement…"

"I wonder where Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun have gone to," Hinata mused.

Sakura waved her hand flippantly, "Probably off doing guy stuff."

Hinata was actually missing Sasuke because, surprisingly she was having a good time with him. Even though he was kind of quiet and scary and seemingly uninterested at times, she was comfortable with him and could talk in full sentences around him. She smiled to herself; because she was sure that he was going to kiss her before Karin and Hidan had caused a scene. And she found herself thinking that she would not have minded that kiss one bit.

Meanwhile, Ino was busy tugging on Kiba trying to get him to go to the dance floor, while he was fixated on Hinata's every move. He couldn't even make a break for it and get to spend time with Hinata because Ino was clinging to him like a leech. Not that he minded having a beautiful girl on his arm all evening – _WAIT! What am I thinking? I am in love with Hinata! _But the moment Ino yanked him from the table, he turned to give her an annoyed look, instead, he looked into her light blue eyes and felt a fluttering sensation in his tummy.

On the other side of the hall, a masked Itachi and Hana were making out in a corner, without a care in the world until they heard Jiraiya's booming voice. Hana sighed as Itachi's lips left hers.

"Shall we?"

"Do we have to?" Hana whined.

"…no."

And so they stayed where they were.

Neji and Tenten stood up holding hands and walked over to Hinata and Sakura and they were soon joined by Shikamaru, Temari, Lee, Chouji, Gaara, Matsuri and Kankuro. Ino was doing her best to keep Kiba away from the rest of the group and all to herself. She was planning on telling him how she felt about him at midnight.

"So as you all know, it's fifteen minutes until midnight and the start of a new year," then Jiraiya paused as everyone cheered, "And some of us are familiar with a special tradition that happens at midnight on New Year's Day…"

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke had finally located the sake stash. They eventually figured that they didn't have to sneak around because no one was interested in their presence. Now they were faced with the problem of getting it open. "How can you not be able to open it? Mr Big Sake Drinker?" Sasuke muttered while tugging on the cork.

"I didn't ever have to open it! Okay, okay, let me try again! This time I'll do it!"

Sasuke tossed the bottle at him and Naruto strained and strained to open it. Sasuke shook his head. He was starting to feel more and more pathetic by the second. Getting drunk just to be able to kiss a girl, yeah his Uchiha ancestors would have been so ashamed of him right now.

"At the stroke of midnight…" they heard Jiraiya saying, "You have to kiss the person standing next to you!"

Sasuke and Naruto looked at each other. "What time is it?" Sasuke demanded.

"Eleven fifty six, damn I can't wait to go home," said one of the cooks who was stirring something in a huge metal pot.

"Come, "Sasuke said, tugging at Naruto again, "I have to get out there and get next to Hinata before midnight!"

Naruto was still trying to get the cork loose, "Let's go!"

To their surprise, the cork did get loose and ricocheted off into the distance as Naruto took a swig from the bottle and passed it to Sasuke who also took a quick swig, grimaced and ran out of the kitchen. Unfortunately, the cork struck the electricity mains that was located in the kitchen and caused a blackout. There were screams and whispers of panic and some confusion that resulted.

"I can't see anything! I can't see anything, oh my goodness that youthful power of sight has been taken from me, I can't see anything!" Lee panicked.

"I see everything," Neji, who had enough sense to activate his Byakugan, said.

"I can't even see a foot in front of my face!" Kankuro complained.

"If you don't shut up, you will see a foot in front of your face – mine!" Temari yelled, because she was pissed about people bumping into her and stomping her feet in the chaotic darkness.

"Stay calm everyone, this just makes things much more romantic and interesting," Jiraiya said with a laugh, "Just two minutes to go…"

Sasuke felt alarmed, how was he going to find Hinata now? He activated his sharingan but all he could see was a huge mass of chakra concentrated in the middle of the hall. He groaned and deactivated it. _Guess I'm going to have to do it the Inuzuka way and sniff her out, she always smells like lavender…_

"How am I going to kiss Sakura when I can't even see her?" Naruto's voice whined somewhere to the left of Sasuke.

"You kiss her all the time, what does it matter?"

"It will be more special on the stroke of midnight!"

"One minute to go…oh and have I mentioned that there will be a prize of 50 thousand ryo for every couple that does participate in the midnight kiss? Well now you know!"

"Fifty thousand! Imagine how much ramen I could eat!"

"Idiot. I wonder how he plans to see which couples have participated if the lights are all off."

There was no reply from Naruto so Sasuke assumed that he had gone in search for Sakura. Sasuke wished he had a better sense of smell, because right now, all he could smell was sweat and a mix of different melded scents.

"This is not happening," Sasuke muttered. He wanted to tear his hair out. Here came the perfect opportunity and it was once again ruined.

"I must find my Sasuke and kiss him at midnight so that he will be mine forever!"

"He will probably be scarred forever…" said the voice of Suigetsu.

Sasuke was lucky he happened to overhear this particular conversation, because Karin was on the prowl for him again.

"Help me look for him!"

"You're the one with the sensory ability!"

"Oh yeah, and his chakra is _divine, _imagine what those lips must taste like," Karin said.

_Oh no you don't_, Sasuke thought, while taking off in what he hoped was the opposite direction. Jiraiya had already started the countdown to midnight and Sasuke was nowhere near to finding Hinata.

"Ten!...Nine!...Eight!..."

Sasuke decided it was time to put aside his pride as he shouted over the noise, "Hinata! Hinata where are you?"

He was bumped aside by someone trying to also get to their partners.

"Dammit!" Sasuke swore.

A few feet away, a nervous Hinata was wringing her hands, trying not to be too overwhelmed by the situation. She looked up into the darkness as she thought she heard someone call her name.

"Seven!...Six!...Five!...Four!"

She activated her Byakugan and saw the adorable sight of Sasuke, looking frazzled, confused and irritated all at once. She saw his lips move, calling out her name and she smiled. She began to walk forward quickly trying to get to him, feeling brave within the cloak of darkness.

"Three!...Two!...One!... Happy New Year!"

Sasuke's shoulders fell. _Well fuck._

Just as he was about to turn around and try to find his way back to the kitchen to get back to that sake bottle, he felt a pair of lips crash down upon his. His eyes widened and then his brows furrowed a little. After a gruelling few seconds, he pushed the kisser away roughly and made a run for it. That kiss did not feel right, not right at all. In fact it felt unholy. Sasuke couldn't quite out his finger on it quite yet, but the person felt familiar and smelled familiar. He could still taste them on his lips. The unmistakeable taste of cherry lipgloss.

Ironically, the lights happened to come on just after that and more chaos ensued.

"OH MY GOD CHOUJI!"

"You are such a lazy kisser!" Temari berated Shikamaru, 'I had to do all the work, I might as well just kiss myself!"

"Why don't you then?" Shikamaru muttered under his breath.

Ino and Kiba were still kissing and appeared to be enjoying every second of it. Gaara and Matsuri were also still joined at the lip.

Sasuke turned around to try and spot who had made the fatal error of kissing him but he didn't see anybody who could be a suspect. He assumed whoever had done it would be back to bug him once the lights were on. His eyes swept the room and landed on Hinata, who was standing rooted to the spot, Byakugan still activated, and with a look of total shock and incomprehension on her face.

* * *

Hinata was certainly taken aback by what had happened. She had been so ready to put aside all her insecurities, her fear, and shyness and go ahead and kiss Sasuke at midnight. But someone had already beaten her to it.

No, she was far from angry. She was utterly confused.

"That was a youthful kiss that set my heart on fire and made my hot blood boil hotter!" Lee declared, looking dreamily at Sakura.

"Lee-san! Why did you? How could you? I'm dating Naruto for Kami's sake!" Sakura raged.

Hinata saw Sasuke looking at her, and he began to walk towards her slowly. She didn't turn away as he stood in front of her.

"You saw everything with your Byakugan didn't you?" he asked softly.

She nodded.

"Who…who kissed me?"

"M-Maybe you should sit down," Hinata said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

* * *

**UH OH! Who was the mysterious person who kissed Sasuke?**

**Will Sasuke and Hinata ever have an uninterrupted moment together?**

**Will everyone be getting fifty thousand ryo?**

**Find out in the next chapter : Going in for the kill.**

**Okay, so I'm sorry for the long wait and I know this chapter was supposed to be 'going in for the kill' but ideas changed and I had to prolong that! **

**Hope this New Years inspired chapter was worth it! I had actually planned to get this out on New Year's Eve but…stuff happened…**

**Please check out my friend MasochisticMeliii's fanfics, she is new to fanfiction and is a really talented writer!**

**You should also check out fanfics by Inuyonas, a brilliant writer with an awesome sense of humour!**

**To those who haven't already read 'Shinobi of Honor' by Lady Crack…you should definitely check it out, it is AMAZING! Lady Crack, if you're reading this, I'm sorry I haven't reviewed, but I promise to review every single chapter when I read it again! xD**

**Thank you for reading, please review!**


	13. Going in for the kill

**A/N: It's been awhile! Thank you guys for all the reviews!**

**Last time on Konoha Cruise Ship…**

Hinata saw Sasuke looking at her, and he began to walk towards her slowly. She didn't turn away as he stood in front of her.

"You saw everything with your Byakugan didn't you?" he asked softly.

She nodded.

"Who…who kissed me?!"

"M-Maybe you should sit down," Hinata said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

**Going in for the kill**

Sasuke sat down heavily and slumped in his chair, his entire body felt numb. Yes, this was a feeling that he had experienced once before, after a certain incident…

Hinata was looking at him cautiously, she really didn't want to tell him who it was, because it might just cause a commotion. "M-maybe its best you just…forget about it."

"No," Sasuke said, looking off into the distance, "I have to know." He faced Hinata with a dead serious expression.

"Okay…"

"Was it Karin?"

Hinata shook her head.

"Tasted like cherry. Wait a sec – it was Sakura!"

Hinata shook her head again. Sasuke looked around the room as though he might catch the culprit just by doing that. He noticed that Gaara was eating some kind of cherry tart and his lips was coated with it before licking it off with his tongue. Panic rose up within Sasuke. _Why would Gaara kiss me? Wasn't he straight?_

"It was - " Hinata was about to say, until Naruto showed up with Sakura in tow.

"Did you guys kiss?" Sakura inquired brightly, looking from a distraught looking Sasuke to a nervous looking Hinata. At her words, Hinata turned a brilliant shade of red and stuttered a "N-no."

Sakura gave Sasuke an exasperated look, "Why not?"

"I was miles away and someone else - " Sasuke paused, and didn't continue any further.

"You wouldn't believe who had the nerve to kiss Sakura-chan!" Naruto yelled, "That Lee, I'm going to kick all the youthfulness out of his ass! Only I get to kiss her!" And with that, he pulled her close and pressed his lips to hers fiercely.

"Naruto!" Sakura scolded and pushed him away. She opened her purse and pulled out a tube of lipgloss to retouch what Naruto had ruined. Her lips were once again glistening cherry-red. It was then that it hit Sasuke like a boulder, "You!" He jumped up from the table and grabbed Naruto by the collar. Hinata and Sakura were gaping at their dates in shock as Sasuke was shaking Naruto back and forth.

"Why – would – you – kiss – me – you – IDIOT?" Sasuke said in between shaking Naruto who was already very dizzy. It took Kakashi, Sakura, Hinata, Gaara and Matsuri to pull Sasuke away from Naruto.

"Let me at him!" Sasuke said, losing composure. Naruto had been kissing Sakura so often that night that his own lips began tasting like the cherry lipgloss that she wore. And for some reason unknown to the ninja universe, Naruto had kissed Sasuke. That's why it felt so familiar and unnatural, because it was exactly like that time at the academy when that dumb kid pushed Naruto on to Sasuke.

"It was an accident! I didn't know it was you next to me!" Naruto explained when he recovered.

-X-

Neji was within earshot and heard all of this. "I don't know why those two don't just come out and admit that they are gay," he said to Tenten who was by his side.

"I don't think they are, don't you know that Sasuke has a crush on Hi - " Tenten stopped short. She remembered how aggro Neji got where his cousin was concerned.

"On who?" Neji asked.

"Uh…nobody. You're right, they are probably gay," Tenten covered.

-X-

Karin just had the most amazing kiss of her life, her eyes even remained closed throughout the encounter. When the kiss finally ended and she opened her eyes, she was disappointed to find that it wasn't Sasuke. It was some guy wearing a heavy hooded coat and shades.

"Who are you?" Karin asked.

"Shino, and you'd better remember the name."

And with that, he walked away, leaving Karin both amazed and confused. But not for long, she had to locate her one true love, Sasuke.

Nearby, Hidan was choking and sputtering after being kissed by Kakuzu. Kakuzu was running around trying to find Jiraiya so that he could get his Fifty thousand ryo.

"Fucking weirdo." Hidan swore, "That fucker will do anything for money."

He looked over at Deidara who's two palms were making out with each other.

"Money-loving bastards," Hidan said, shaking his head.

Pein was still making out with Konan and Itachi was still kissing Hana, while Kisame watched jealously while standing against the wall. Sasori was nowhere to be seen.

-X-

"So you just kissed any random person next to you?" this time it was Sakura who sounded outraged.

Naruto was looking sheepish, "For fifty thousand ryo!"

"Hmm. That was obviously a trick. Jiraiya-sama is not known for being so generous with money," Kakashi said thoughtfully.

"You really are an idiot! IDIOT!" Sasuke yelled, trying to lunge at Naruto again.

"C-calm down, Sasuke-kun," Hinata said, and surprisingly, Sasuke found his anger at the blonde abating. Naruto got his first and second kiss, but no matter, Sasuke was determined that Hinata got the third one. Third time lucky, right? Sasuke didn't even have to beat Naruto because Sakura was doing it for him. Feeling a wave of bravado suddenly wash over him, Sasuke held his hand out to Hinata, "Let's get out of here."

Hinata blinked at him and then at his hand, then she tentatively took it. They walked out of the hall, leaving the shocked faces of Sakura, Kakashi, Gaara and Matsuri behind.

"Come on Naruto, we'd better follow them in case Sasuke does something stupid," Sakura said, grabbing a dazed Naruto's hand.

Sasuke and Hinata were almost out the door when Sasuke heard the voice of his nightmares, "Sasuuuuuukeeee! Where are you going? Wait for me!"

Sasuke cringed as he turned around and saw Karin running towards him. He gripped Hinata's hand tighter as he pulled her into a run. Hinata gasped and tried to match his speed, but she couldn't in her heels. "W-wait, Sasuke-kun!"

He stopped and looked at her apologetically, but Hinata had her heels off in a second and she was the one pulling him as they ran away from Karin. "Quick! In here!" Hinata said and pulled him in to what looked like a darkened stock room. She activated her byakugan and scoped out the area outside the stock room.

"She looks confused, she doesn't know we're in here," Hinata said, sounding breathless as she walked Karin stomp her foot angrily and walk away in the opposite direction.

Sasuke started laughing first, out of relief and then he started to feel giddy. Hinata joined him in soft laughter. Sasuke looked at her, and even though there was only a sliver of light in the dark stock room, he couldn't help but take in just how remarkably beautiful she was. Hinata noticed him staring at her and she went all rosy cheeked. Sasuke's heart sped up and he leaned in –

- Just as someone opened the door to the stock room. Sasuke and Hinata jumped back from each other. "Nobody is supposed to be in here," the nasal voice of the girl from the X-rated candy stall drawled. She walked in and grabbed a couple of boxes and held them up, "The edible underwear is a real hit."

Sasuke groaned inwardly. Another ripe moment gone because of he was surrounded by idiots, idiots that thwarted his every move that he tried to put on Hinata! "W-we should go," Hinata, "It's getting late." Her eyes were averted and she didn't look at him.

_Shit! What if she didn't even want me to kiss her? What if she thinks I am some kind of pervert? _Sasuke inwardly freaked out. They walked out of the stock room before the girl could shut the door on them. Sasuke was standing awkwardly, all of his earlier bravado had evaporated. "Do you…uh…want to go back to your room? I mean – alone – I mean, you go to yours and I go to mine. I didn't mean to imply that we should go to your room together," Sasuke found himself rambling.

Hinata giggled, "You are so funny, Sasuke-kun, and so silly." She bent over double and started laughing, "I thought you were stuck up and boring and dull but you're not!"

Sasuke was taken aback and his eye twitched. Her words echoed in his head._ Stuck up, boring and dull._

_Stuck up._

_Boring._

_Dull._

A dark cloud appeared over Sasuke's head. _So that is what she thinks of me…_

His hoards of fangirls obviously didn't take this view on him; he was generally used to hearing things like, _Sasuke you're the best! OMG HE'S SO HOT! Isn't he dreamy…_

But stuck up, boring and dull…that was something Naruto might have called him…not something he expected to hear from a girl his own age.

"And here I was thinking that you were too sweet to ever criticize somebody like that."

Hinata immediately stopped laughing and looked ashamed. She had no idea what came over her to say those things to Sasuke. Sure she may have thought them, but to just say them out aloud like that…she never ever felt comfortable enough around anyone to just insult them.

"I'm r-really sorry, Sasuke-kun. I do - "

"Don't apologise. I like that you're brave enough to say those things to my face. Now I know what I need to do," Sasuke said thoughtfully.

Hinata didn't dare ask what it was that he needed to do; she only hoped that it didn't involve killing her for her errant mouth.

-X-

Unknown to them, Sakura and Naruto followed closely behind, taking care to blend in with the shadows and nearby conveniently placed trashcans every time Sasuke or Hinata turned around. Because, being the ninja that they were, Sasuke and Hinata could sense that they were being followed.

"Sakura-chan, we should be going on our own romantic walk, instead of following them around…" Naruto whined.

"Shhh!" Sakura reprimanded him, "We're supposed to be helping Sasuke-kun."

Naruto pouted and folded his arms like an impudent child, "Heh! Sasuke is so lame, he isn't even talking to her!"

Sakura found herself nodding her head in agreement. For most of her young life Sakura had been crushing on Sasuke, and in her fantasies he was the perfect smooth, romantic hero. Right now, looking at the hapless Sasuke, Sakura couldn't help thinking that she really dodged a bullet. They had to somehow help him to get rid of his arrogance…or in this case, was it simply just shyness?

"He looks like he's going to say something!" Naruto exclaimed, as they watched Sasuke grow more fidgety and open his mouth a couple of times and then close it. Hinata was rubbing her arms up and down to get rid of her goosebumps because the night air was getting chilly.

Finally, they saw Sasuke's lips move. "Are you cold?" he asked Hinata.

Hinata nodded.

"It's okay, we're almost at the resort."

Both Naruto and Sakura face-palmed. Naruto made a clone of himself appear in Sasuke's shadow so that Hinata wouldn't notice and it growled in Sasuke's ear, "Give her your jacket, teme!"

The clone disappeared and Sasuke turned around fast and spotted Naruto and Sakura, he turned back quickly, took off his jacket and then trying to act casual but with trembling hands, he draped the jacket over Hinata. She looked up and gave him a gorgeous smile that made his neck heat up.

"Thank you, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke was going to respond with something witty, or cool, but his throat was dry and all he managed to do was cough.

A Naruto shadow clone appeared again and quickly disappeared with the words, "Tell her it looks better on her!"

"It looks better – uh, on you."

He saw her shyly put her head down with a slight smile on her face. Sasuke felt disappointed as they reached the resort too soon. He stood there awkwardly as Hinata opened the door. It was then that another shadow clone appeared behind him and nearly startled him to death, "Kiss her goodnight!"

Naruto really needed to stop doing that. Sasuke was so rattled, instead of leaning in for a kiss when Hinata's pale eyes were looking into his, he held out his hand for her to shake.

"Thank you…for tonight," he said lamely as Hinata shook his hand with a giggle. Before he could turn away, Hinata stood on her tip toes and kissed his cheek. Before he could respond, all he saw was Hinata blushing madly as she slammed the door.

Sasuke touched the spot on his cheek where she kissed him and a dreamy look came over his face.

"Look at you," Naruto teased, as he and Sakura looked bemused at the dumb grin on Sasuke's face.

-X-

Karin's fists were clenched and she was grinding her teeth so loudly that Suigetsu and Juugo expected them to fall like sawdust out of her mouth. "That little ugh! All this time I thought she was helping me, but she just wanted my Sasuke to herself, throwing herself at him like that!"

"Actually, he looks like he's pretty smitten with her." Suigetsu pointed out.

"Hmph! I'll show her!" Karin said, as she stalked to her room that she shared with Hinata.

"Hello," Hinata said brightly, "How was your evening?"

Karin glared at her and walked to her bed, she picked up her pillow and walked towards Hinata. She lifted the pillow and then whacked Hinata with it. Hinata looked at her in shock for a few seconds, until she picked up her own pillow and whacked Karin over the head with it.

"You stole Sasuke from me!' Karin snarled and hit Hinata repeatedly with the pillow. Hinata managed to get up from the bed with Karin hovering over her dangerously. She pushed Karin and Karin fell over on to the floor. Hinata aimed scatter cushions at her.

"I d-didn't steal him!"

"You did! I saw you kiss him!" Karin yelled, getting up and hitting Hinata again with a pillow. Hinata was not a mean person, but then again, Karin clearly wasn't a very smart person.

"You – damn – little – homewrecker," Karin said, in between assaulting Hinata with a feather pillow.

Hinata picked up her pillow and began beating Karin back, "He – doesn't – even – like – you!"

"Of course he does!" Karin snarled, discarding the pillow and lunging for Hinata's hair. Hinata felt a few strands part with her scalp and she got mad.

No, Hinata was infuriated.

You see, Hyuuga's were very particular about their hair.

She injected her chakra into the pillow that she was holding and hit Karin with it. It was such a force that Karin flew through the wood panelled walls and left a Karin-shaped hole in the wall.

-X-

Sasuke was having a blissful dream; he was at the beach with Hinata and she was rubbing him down with sun block. "Thank you, Hina, it's your turn now," Sasuke said, as Hinata turned her bikini-clad back to him so he could rub her back. He was about to touch her skin until a bright light filled his vision and he found himself awake.

Sasuke groaned and put his pillow over his head. Naruto, in the bed next to him, was still snoring loudly.

"Wake up, wake up. We need to leave," Kakashi said, coming over and shaking Naruto.

"What? Why? We just got to sleep!" Naruto said groggily, rubbing the sleep out of his blue eyes.

"The owners of the resort want us to move out immediately," Kakashi said boredly, more interested in reading from his book. The book he was reading was thicker than usual, and it wasn't green, orange or red. It had a dark cover with a picture of a silver tie on it. Kakashi was very interested in this new book called Fifty Shades of Grey (1) which he bought at the X-rated candy store. Apparently they stocked books too.

"Why?" asked Sasuke.

"Just come and see," Kakashi said as he snapped his book shut and led them out.

When they were outside their room, Sasuke saw that everyone else from their crew was outside as well, looking incredibly sleepy and annoyed.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru commented.

There was one very irritated-looking old man that appeared to be shouting at Kurenai and Asuma. "I hate when you ninja's come here and just wreck the place! That is 100 000 ryo worth of damage!"

"Relax old man, we will get it fixed," Asuma tried to placate the old man, but he wasn't having any of it.

"Out! Out! Get out!"

"I'm r-really sorry," Hinata whimpered, because it was her fault that Karin had flown through three rooms of the resort.

"It's okay, Hinata." Kurenai reassured her.

"If you're a shinobi, get out!" the old man screamed.

Karin was sitting near Suigetsu and Juugo looking pretty beat up. Both sides of her hair was a mess and her dress was ripped in a few places.

"What's happening here?" Naruto demanded to know.

"Hinata and Karin had a fight…Hinata won but destroyed three rooms at the resort in the process," Kakashi elaborated.

"Wow!" Naruto said in awe.

Hinata was looking very embarrassed.

Sasuke was looking at her in wonder. Hinata was officially the girl of his dreams.

"Well, time to get back on the ship everyone. Pack your things." Kakashi informed them.

-X-

**Hinata and Sasuke are finally starting to get closer!**

**Will Karin back off or continue to be an obstacle?**

**Will Sasuke ever get a proper kiss?**

**Find out next: Window of Opportunity**

**Has anyone else read the Fifty Shades series? Hehe, it seems like something Kakashi would read…**

**Please review!**


	14. Window of Opportunity

**Chapter 14 – Window of Opportunity**

Hinata was faced with a huge dilemma. She was starting to really like Sasuke Uchiha. He wasn't even her type, nor had she ever even spared him a thought in the past, but now, he was all she could think about. How had she not noticed how handsome he was all this time? He was even kind of sweet. Oh, right. She had been obsessed with his best friend. But now that Naruto was out of the picture, what if she was just suddenly into Sasuke because she was on the rebound?

Another reason why she wanted to stay away from Sasuke was because of Karin. After the whole episode at the resort, Hinata decided it was too much trouble to get involved with a guy who a crazy person was after. She wanted to keep her distance from Sasuke and Karin. Karin would be easy, but Hinata wasn't so sure about Sasuke.

She needed advice on the matter but she didn't know who to ask. She wasn't comfortable asking Sakura or Ino. Tenten might tell Neji. Her teammates were definitely out of the question, both Kiba and Shino would obviously be biased in whatever advice they gave since they did not like Sasuke.

She would have to go to Kurenai for this one. Her sensei was like a mother figure to her. She found Kurenai on the upper deck of the ship eating ice cream out of a huge dish. Luckily Asuma was nowhere in sight. "Kurenai-sensei, how are you?" Hinata greeted the beautiful dark haired woman who was wolfing down spoonful after spoonful of ice cream.

"Hinata, what brings you here? Finally remembered I still exist?"

Hinata winced but then remembered that it was just Kurenai's crazy hormones talking.

"I – I just need advice … about a boy."

Suddenly, Kurenai just started weeping abruptly. "Stay away from boys! They will only do this to you!" she cried, pointing at her pregnant belly.

"O – Oh, I'm sorry Kurenai-sensei," Hinata said, putting her arms around Kurenai, then she noticed Kurenai's ice cream dish was nearly empty, "Do you want me to get you more ice cream?"

Kurenai looked up at her, her red eyes were shining, "Yes dear, you are so thoughtful…unlike certain people."

-X-

"You know what Kakashi, I just can't wait for that baby to pop out so that Kurenai can start acting normal again. I can't keep up with her crazy moods. She wants to do it. All. The. Time. But I just can't you know, what if the baby sees?" Asuma said, puffing on his tenth cigarette in the past hour.

Kakashi spit out the sip of beer he just took and his mask now had a beer stain on it.

"Now she thinks I don't care about her! But what about me? This is hard on me too!"

Kakashi just stood there silently, preferring to let Asuma go on with his ranting.

"Her sex drive has spiked just like Anko back in our Chuunin days," Asuma said as Kakashi choked on his sip of beer once again.

"_You too_?" Kakashi asked in horror.

Asuma's cheeks suddenly turned red, "She was uh... my first, women…crazy huh?"

"Speaking of crazy women, what's next on Tsunade's agenda for the younglings?"

Asuma unfolded a ratty looking paper from his back pocket, "A charity event on the next island that we are stopping at."

"That doesn't sound too bad, let's round them up and tell them. Oi Neji, could you come over here for a second?" Kakashi yelled, noticing the dark-haired Hyuuga strolling hand-in-hand with his girlfriend Tenten. As soon as Neji heard Kakashi call his name, he immediately dropped Tenten's hand and put on his stoic façade.

"Yes Kakashi-sensei, Asuma-sensei, what can I do for you?" Neji asked in a serious tone while the two older men resisted the urge to burst out into laughter.

"Could you tell everyone to meet us here in fifteen minutes?" Asuma told him.

Neji nodded, "Anything else?"

"Yes. You can take your girlfriend with you. And there's no need to be ashamed of holding hands in public, as Gai would say 'let the springtime of your love blossom'."

-X-

"Are you being moody just because we got kicked out of the resort?" Naruto asked Sasuke, after he observed his friend being grouchy for the third day in a row. This was not entirely unusual, but prior to this, Sasuke had seemed happy… well as happy as someone who was emotionally constipated could look. Naruto preferred the Sasuke from a few days ago, the one who seemed absent-minded and daydreamy, and always randomly touching a spot on his cheek and smiling to himself.

Sasuke shot him a dirty look, "No."

"Then what?" Naruto pressed.

"Just leave me alone, idiot."

"Now that rudeness is just uncalled for!" Naruto said, jumping on Sasuke's bed.

"What the – get the hell off my bed!" Sasuke tried to push him off.

"Not until you tell me why you're being such a grumpy ass!"

"Persistent freak. Fine. It's Hinata," Sasuke said with a heavy sigh, sitting up suddenly and causing Naruto to tumble over on to the floor. "She hasn't spoken to me, let alone looked at me for the past couple of days."

"I thought you two were really starting to hit it off," Naruto thought, scratching his blonde head.

"So did I," Sasuke said gravely, thinking about the last happy moments he had spent with Hinata. Not counting the ones in his dreams of course. With just a chaste kiss on his cheek, Hinata had managed to send his hormones spiralling out of control, invade his every thought, and also confuse him immensely. Ever since that night of the party, Hinata had been avoiding him like the plague. Each time he tried to go up to her or talk to her, she would always suddenly disappear or look away quickly.

"So how are you going to fix whatever you did to her?" Naruto asked.

"_I _didn't do anything…idiot."

"Oh…maybe she's just not that into you!"

"Yeah, probably into idiotic blondes," Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"Or… maybe she's a player!"

Sasuke stared at Naruto for a few seconds. "A…player? Really? Hinata Hyuuga is a player?"

"It's always the quiet ones you gotta watch out for…"

"Hn. Whatever, I am done, I give up. Forget everything. Forget restoring the Uchiha clan!" Sasuke grumbled moodily, like a love struck teenager who didn't really mean that they were giving up on a person.

"What!" Naruto exclaimed, practically jumping on top of Sasuke on his bed again, "You old perv you! You want to restore your clan with Hinata-chan! You want to make babies with her! Oh, oh, oh you like her with your pe-!"

Naruto didn't get to finish his crude sentence because someone had opened the door to their room and let out a horrified gasp.

It was Neji and Tenten.

Sasuke immediately pushed Naruto who was hovering over him in a rather compromising position. Neji looked like he was in the middle of taking a deep breath and counting to ten.

"Uhh… how much of that did you hear exactly?" Naruto asked, knowing that he and Sasuke might be in a world of trouble if Neji heard them, or rather Naruto, talking about his cousin like that.

"Hear what?" Neji asked, trying to look dignified, "I just opened the door and saw…and saw…you two-"

"Oh just hold that thought," Sasuke interrupted, "We weren't doing anything, this idiot-"

"I really don't care," Neji said, "I just have a message from Kakashi and Asuma, meet them on the upper deck in ten minutes."

And then he left, slamming the door behind him. He looked at Tenten who had her hand over her nose. "Tenten, why do you have a nosebleed?"

-X-

Sasuke looked around wearily as he stood with Naruto and Sakura on the upper deck. He had successfully managed to evade Karin for the past couple of days but he was worried that she might be lying in wait and planning something horrible for him. He noticed Hinata arrive with her teammates. She was walking slowly and awkwardly with her head bowed, but when she looked up her pale eyes instantly met Sasuke's dark gaze. She held his gaze for a few seconds before blushing and looking away. Sasuke swore under his breath in irritation. He could play the ignoring game as well as anyone. He was the master of it.

Sakura elbowed him, "Aren't you going to go over and talk to Hinata-chan?"

"I don't think she would want that," Sasuke said stiffly.

"Why not? What did you do?" Sakura asked.

"Why do you and Naruto immediately assume it's my fault?"

Sakura looked sheepish, "I just can't see Hinata-chan being at fault here."

"Well it is _exactly_ her fault, she is av-"

"Settle down everybody," Asuma commanded as the rest of their crew arrived.

Sasuke saw Hinata laugh at something Kiba said and he felt anger surge within him. He really felt like throwing Kiba overboard or anyone else that made Hinata smile that wasn't him. He stopped glaring at Kiba and decided to focus his attention on what Asuma and Kakashi were saying.

"…At this next island, you will all be participating in a charity event to raise money for the-" Kakashi squinted at the paper in his hand, "The MEP charity I think."

"I will give this charitable event my all and raise the most money!" Lee proclaimed.

"Wrong Lee! It is I that will be raising the most money!" Gai yelled.

And they went on like that for a while.

"What exactly do we have to do?" Kankuro asked.

"I'm not sure, all will be revealed once we dock on the next island which should be any minute now," Kakashi said. Sure enough, the teenagers looked out to sea and saw they were approaching land in the form of an exotic looking island that was even more beautiful than the other one. The water that surrounded the boat now was a clear shade of turquoise and there were shoals of brightly coloured fish swimming around.

Sasuke couldn't help but stare at Hinata as she marvelled at their new surroundings. She had a serene, untroubled smile on her face. She looked up slowly and saw that he was still looking at her. Her smile never left her face and Sasuke found his lips involuntarily curve into a half-smile. Suddenly the ships horn sounded, signalling that the ship was about to dock and Hinata looked away startled.

Sasuke shook his head and tried to cover up his smile. The ignoring game was just not going to work here.

Half an hour later Naruto and Sasuke were settled in their new room at the inn they were staying at on the new island. "Ah this is the life!" Naruto proclaimed, flopping down on the soft bed.

"Don't get too comfortable, we have to go see what this charity thing is all about," Sasuke said, eager to see Hinata again. Naruto groaned as he picked himself off the bed and followed Sasuke out of the room.

"You seem awfully excited to go to this event," Naruto said.

"I'm not."

"But you're smiling."

"I'm not."

"When you do this," Naruto said, grinning like a Cheshire cat, "Then it's called a smile."

"I'm pretty sure that I'm not doing that," Sasuke argued.

"Haha, whatever," Naruto said, throwing his hands up, deciding that for once, he would stop taunting Sasuke. They arrived at a small meeting room where all the others were gathered.

"This is Miss Asuka, she will tell you more about the charity event," Kakashi said, as a woman wearing a dark, heavy dress walked forward. Her face was covered with veil and she was very tall.

"Thank you all for agreeing to help the MEP charity, we are very grateful," the woman said in a raspy voice.

"Excuse me, but what does MEP stand for?" Naruto asked.

"Uhhhh," the woman faltered.

"Moody Emo People?" Naruto offered.

"No," the Asuka said stiffly, "It doesn't really stand for anything, but it will help the world and make it a better place!"

"How?" Naruto asked.

"Let's just move along here," Kakashi said.

"Right, thank you. The event is going to be a date auction. Each one of you dashing young men will be auctioned off to whoever will bid the highest for you in exchange for one date. The winner of the bid of course will dictate the nature and course of the date," Asuka said.

Warning bells went off in Sasuke's head, he could not foresee this ending well for him at all, unless Hinata bid on him but he couldn't see that happening.

"No fair, why is only us guys that have to do the dumb date thing?" Kiba asked, and for once, Sasuke actually agreed with him.

"It's safer than auctioning off girls," Asuka replied as if it was blatantly obvious.

"I refuse to sell my body for money," Kankuro decided.

"You are not selling your body, Kankuro, we are not asking you to become a ninja prostitute. We just want to raise some money for the MEP charity," Kakashi told him.

"Yeah, you should be lucky you're even going to get a date!" Temari laughed, "Assuming someone bids on you that is."

"The MEP charity which we know nothing about! They still haven't told us how they plan to make the world a better place," Naruto responded sensibly.

Asuka threw her hands up in the air," Fine! If you must know, the money will go towards creating a peaceful new world where no wars and fighting will ever occur! It's a secret mission which I'm not allowed to divulge too much on, but you get the general idea."

"Sounds pretty cool!" Naruto decided.

"Sounds fishy to me," Sasuke said, "I refuse to participate."

"You have to, Tsunade-sama's orders," Kakashi told him.

"I don't care," Sasuke said.

"I'll do it, if it's for charity!" Naruto exclaimed.

"I'll do it too, bet I'll get more girls to bid on me than you Naruto," Kiba said proudly.

Sasuke rolled his eyes but then he saw Hinata looking at Naruto and Kiba in admiration.

_Dammit, she probably thinks they are so great for giving to charity…_Sasuke thought, and then he said, "Okay, fine, I'll do this… for charity."

Naruto elbowed him and whispered, "For the get into Hinata's good books charity hey?"

-X-

That evening, Gaara was the first to take the stage. Asuka thought that Gaara would be a great show opener and Sasuke would be a great show stopper. The other males tried not to take it personally, but there was some tension in the dressing room.

"Those two didn't even want to do this," Kiba muttered angrily to Shino while they were in the dressing room. There were also some other young men in there who they did not recognize.

They could hear the women and some men in the audience screaming crazily for Gaara as the date auction began.

"Ladies and gentleman, welcome to the first annual date auction to raise money for the wonderful MEP charity. Some of you lucky ladies here tonight could be going on a date with one of our fine selection of young men that have agreed to participate. So loosen up those purse strings ladies and let these young men show you what they've got!" Asuka announced.

"I'm feeling very loose!" one old lady called out from the audience.

"Show them what we've got? What is she talking about? I don't have anything!" Chouji complained.

"Damn right you don't," Neji muttered.

Naruto was looking hyped up as usual while Shikamaru looked bored out of his mind but he snapped out of it and looked more lively when Temari entered the room. The other girls followed behind her and they all had big frangipani flowers in their hair, brightly coloured bikini's and sarong's tied around their waists and were barefoot.

Sasuke tried not to look at Hinata because he knew something embarrassing would happen to him if he did, so he just stared at her feet. They were so tiny and cute that he wanted to kiss them. She had the perfect toes. Sasuke had never even thought of toes in that way before, in fact, he never thought of toes at all.

"Better do your best out there boys, we don't want to be wasting our money now," Temari said with a wink.

"You girls are also allowed to bid?" Naruto asked.

"Yup!" Sakura said, "But if I win the bid, you have to pay for everything on the date."

"Aww…"

There was a lot of commotion happening out in the hall where Gaara was being auctioned on the stage. Ladies were screaming wildly and this made Sasuke's stomach churn.

"And sold! To the beautiful lady in green. You get this fiery red-headed ninja all to yourself for one date!"

-X-

Meanwhile, another red-headed ninja was carefully plotting her next move amidst the throng of women gathered hoping to win a date. "Juugo! Give me Orochimaru's credit card!"

Juugo looked worried, "I don't think we should use it on such a-"

"We are supposed to capture Sasuke, am I right?" Karin asked, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

Suigetsu and Juugo nodded.

"So if I can get a date with him, then we can nab him using this!" she pulled a small bottle of pills from her pocket.

"What are those?" Suigetsu asked with a raised eyebrow.

There was a devious grin on Karin's face, "Let's just say this will knock him out for a while so that I – I mean we can have our way – uh, I mean, capture him."

There was another ninja nearby that happened to overhear this particular conversation. He narrowed his deep-red and black sharingan eyes. _Not on my watch_, thought Itachi Uchiha. He slipped behind a beaded curtain area where the rest of the Akatsuki were hiding, minus Pein, Konan, Kakuzu and Tobi who were currently occupied.

"Deidara, come with me," Itachi ordered the blonde.

"OOOOOH!" Hidan called.

"How mature," Itachi deadpanned.

"What do you want?" Deidara asked.

"We are going to prevent a disaster from happening."

"You're finally going to let me do your hair?" Deidara asked hopefully.

Itachi glared at him and turned back in to the auction hall while Deidara followed after him eagerly. Although Deidara acted like he hated Itachi and all things Uchiha, he actually loved hanging out with the guy.

"So what are we really doing?"

"We are going to pretend to be women and outbid that little four-eyed freaky product of Orochimaru's influence," Itachi said, as he transformed into a stunning dark-haired woman. Deidara nearly fainted on the spot as he recognized that Itachi looked just as good as a woman than he did as a man.

"Stop gaping at me like an idiot and transform."

"Yes ma'am – uh, I mean Itachi."

Deidara transformed into what looked almost like a clone of Ino.

"You do know that this is our auction right? Kakuzu made it up to raise funds for Akatsuki's plans." Deidara said.

"I am aware."

-X-

"Sold for only 1000 ryo to an old lady! Why do I always end up with the oldies?" Kiba moaned. Ino didn't even want to bid on him, Hinata looked like she wasn't even paying attention to the auction at all. Even Shino managed to raise more money and snag quite a hottie for a date. The only person who got less than Kiba was Lee, who was sitting in the corner looking distraught at his failure. Chouji who also didn't raise much, was consoling Lee while chewing on a hotdog. "Don't worry, women are just shallow."

"My turn," Naruto declared, tossing his shirt aside as he got to the stage. The women immediately started screaming and cheering.

"What a show off," Kiba muttered.

Naruto was loving the attention as he flexed his muscles and grinned saucily into the crowd trying to meet Sakura's eyes. The pink haired girl was blushing furiously and raised the paddle and started the bid with 100 ryo.

"Ooh, starting things off with 100 ryo, do I hear 150 ryo?" Asuka called.

Deidara disguised as a woman raised his paddle.

"What the hell are you doing?" Itachi asked.

"We can get a chance to capture him like this!"

Sakura looked to the side to see who bid against her. "Ino!" she cried out.

"Uh who?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah, that's not me forehead," Ino said, she was sitting right next to Sakura.

"Wow that girl looks so much like you!" Sakura said, looking from Ino to disguised Deidara in awe. Deidara rolled his eyes. The bids for Naruto were coming in fast and soon Sakura couldn't afford bidding.

"Stop," Itachi warned Deidara, "We need the money for Sasuke."

"There are some cougars on the prowl," Sakura said angrily.

"Rich cougars," Ino said, as Naruto just got sold for 80 000 ryo to a dark-haired, beautiful older woman who looked like she was smoking a cigar.

Now that Naruto's turn was over, Sasuke felt like vomiting because he was up next. He would rather be in a battle for his life than get auctioned off into a hall of lecherous women. He calmly started walking out the back entrance when Kakashi caught his arm.

"Not so fast," Kakashi said, steering him on to the stage.

"Let's hear it for the showstopper! And ladies, this is your last chance to win a date as well as give something to the MEP charity. This is Sasuke Uchiha! Do we have 100 ryo?"

Sasuke closed his eyes as he heard the screaming.

"Here! Here!" the voice of his nightmares called.

"We have 100!" Asuka announced.

Sasuke opened his eyes and saw Karin, leering at him. She kissed what looked like a gold credit card and waved it in his direction and winked. He was frozen to the spot, staring at her in horror until another voice said, "One fifty!"

Sasuke managed to snap out of it and saw that Hinata had her paddle raised. Sasuke actually felt his face stretch out into a big smile.

"Oh my God, somebody just fainted!" somebody cried.

Karin shot Hinata a dirty look while Hinata looked extremely uncomfortable,

"Two hundred!" Karin called.

"Two fifty," Hinata said.

Neji turned to Kiba looking very puzzled, "Why is my cousin bidding on Sasuke when she didn't even bid on either of us or Naruto?"

Kiba shrugged, "I give up trying to understand women and the things they do…"

"Five thousand!" a random woman called out.

"Make that six thousand!" Karin yelled.

"Well that escalated quickly," Asuka said, "Do we have seven thousand?"

"Yes!" Hinata piped up.

"Eight thousand!" Karin screamed, staring at Hinata furiously.

Sasuke was praying like he never prayed before for Hinata to win the auction. He was even willing to give all the money she spent back to her.

"Nine thousand!" Hinata said, hoping Karin would back down because that was the highest bid she could make.

"Ten thousand!" Karin called.

Hinata looked at Sasuke apologetically and Sasuke felt like he was about to have a panic attack.

"Eleven thousand," the disguised Itachi called out.

Sasuke stared at the new bidder and his eyes went wide, it was one of the most attractive women he had ever seen in his life. She was definitely hot, dark-haired, dark-eyed and looked like she was in her early twenties. In Sasuke's mind, she had nothing over Hinata but Sasuke would gladly go on a date with the mystery lady than with Karin.

"Twelve thousand!" Karin said, staring down her new opponent.

Itachi stared back with killing intent, "Fifty thousand."

"Sixty!"

"One hundred thousand."

"You can't do that!" Karin screamed, "Tell her that she cannot do that!"

"Uhhh, there is no rule against it, do you wish to make a higher bid?" Asuka asked her.

"Dammit! I can't! This card is maxed out!" Karin stomped her feet.

"Well that's too bad, I guess the winner is the stunning lady in black!"

Disguised Itachi had a smug look on his face as he casually approached Sasuke. Karin looked devastated and she stormed out of the auction venue. "This is not over!" she declared to Suigetsu and Juugo who followed her out.

"What are you going to do now?" Suigetsu asked in exasperation.

"We are going to go on that date," Karin said deviously.

-X-

Sasuke breathed a huge sigh of relief when he saw Karin angrily storm away but then he grew worried again when he saw the mystery woman approach him.

"So, I've won a date with you," she said in a low voice.

"Uh, yeah…"

"But I'm going to let you off the hook on one condition."

Sasuke looked at the woman, her face seemed awfully familiar for some reason.

"And what's that?" Sasuke asked.

"You take that young lady over there," she pointed to where Hinata was standing, "on the date instead."

Sasuke couldn't believe his good fortune, he looked over at Hinata who still smiled at him even though he could still see a look of disappointment on her face. Sasuke smiled slightly and looked back at the woman, "I will definitely do that."

"Good. Because the window of opportunity doesn't stay open forever," and with that, the woman walked away and joined the blonde Ino look-alike.

**Will Itachi's hard work finally pay off?**

**Will Sasuke finally get to make Hinata his?**

**Find out next time: Trouble in Paradise**

**P.S: Does anyone know what the MEP charity really is and who Asuka really is?**

**Thank you guys for reading and all the great feedback even though I haven't updated in ages. I have a lot going on at the moment, but I just had tons of ideas for this story that I had to get down. I will try and update my other stories soon!**

**Please review!**


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